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SJ1000

age:

	27

location:

	Manhattan

looking for :

	fun in most of the right places.

more about me:

	I'm a stand-up comedian, writer and nutjob living and working in Manhattan. In '08 I'll cover the presidential election race for MTV News as an online contributor, posting blog entries, video news reports, slide shows, animation, and other magical bits of media. It's part of MTV's Choose or Lose Campaign...and an initiative by the Associated Press...and a charitable project by the Knight Foundation...Check out my MTV web presence for more info. I host "Tub Talk with Sara B." right here on hooksexup.com. Go on up there, and click on the link that says "Video" and then click on "Tub Talk" on the drop-down menu. Then watch me interview writers and producers and comedians and stuff. I also have a full-time day job that is not sexy, but which gives me the health insurance that I need in order to get the pills that keep my brain from exploding, and also the pills that keep a parasite from growing in the region of my undercarriage for nine months until I am forced to vaginally expel it. And I have a boyfriend. I like girls too, but I don't date them right now, because I'm in a monogamous relationship and I'm not a damn ho like I used to be.

6.867

Other Hooksexup Blogs:

Last Dance, Last Dance, Last Dance, Last Dance...For LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!
4/1/2008 9:18:54 PM

It's my last blog post! My last blog post for hooksexup.com's BlogaLog! Whee! Last blog pooooooooooooost!

Where to begin.

Where.

To.

Be.

Gin.

I confess I thought I'd write some grand essay that constituted a meditative reflection on the nature of the digital persona, self-exposure, and Our Modern World while incorporating references to posts created since November 2006, all wrapped up in a funny, charming, slightly poignant bundle. But as I sit here in my boyfriend's apartment, pondering whether or not the pizza I just ate was a good idea, I find myself more inclined to whimsy, laughter, and good old-fashioned thank-yous.

My blog's popularity, at least as measured by average number of comments per post, topped out sometime about a year ago, after folks got used to the idea that I wasn't going to give up much information about my relationship with my boyfriend, Francesco Marciuliano, also known as Ces, who writes the syndicated comic strip (900 newspapers worldwide!) "Sally Forth" (can you tell how proud I am of him by the way I keep linking to things related to him on the Internet, things like this?)

And I'm not surprised that a lot of you seemingly lost interest when I clammed up about ye ole private life; after all, the BlogaLog and all sex blogs/columns are about the delicious thrill of voyeurism, and I wasn't providing much. Plus, my posts got goofier and I started writing more about comedy, which has been my primary interest for a couple of years now, but which started taking over my life more and more beginning in 2007.

All in all, though, I had a fun time and I walk away from the BlogaLog glad to have been here and richer for the experience.

Thanks are in order, first and foremost, to the regular (or semiregular) commenters who gave me the delusion of feeling like the trivial meanderings of my wayward mind meant something to somebody else, at least for a minute a day (or a week). I'm thinking specifically of CrazyLeprechauns, SimplyD, Mahlerman, Kaytey, and, of course, the commenting champions, Mintzworks and Vern. If I forgot a shout-out to a frequent repeat commenter, it's not that I don't appreciate you; it's just that it's hard to remember a year and change's worth of commenters--plus I'm kinda tired right now.

Thanks also go to Sam Apple, my liege and overseer, and Rufus, who oversees all.

And thanks to my fellow-travelers, especially FunkyBrownChick and Charlotte_Web, with whom I've interacted the most--and in person, too! Whoa! They are a delight and I suggest you continue to treat them with loving care and, of course, kindness.

I leave you with photographs of the greatest spiritual leader of our time. Should you have cause to miss me, or to want or need for anything, I suggest you meditate upon this sacred image:

I also suggest you subscribe to this incredible magazine:

And if you actually do miss my Internet presence, go visit

SaraBenincasa.com
Me on MySpace
Things MTV and political

Or my NEW BLOG!

Catch you on the flipside, my dumplings. Stay in touch. Unless you're a fucking weirdo stalker. In which case, don't. But if you're awesome, and most of you are, thanks for reading, and have a great life. ;)

xoxo
Sara Benincasa
New York, NY

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hooksexup.com's "Tub Talk with Sara B." vs. SuperDeluxe.com's "Bathing with Bierko"
3/30/2008 8:28:32 PM

SuperDeluxe did an interview with me for their blog 'cause I pointed out that their new show, "Bathing with Bierko," was surprisingly similar to my own beloved suds-fest "Tub Talk with Sara B." (only Bierko got Malkovich in the tub and I got New York Comedy in the tub.)

They put up the interview and then took it down a few hours later, citing "artist relations" as the problem. I guess the suits over at Turner (SuperDeluxe's parent company) didn't like me calling them copycats. Or maybe it really had to do with "artist" relations, like Bierko was super-upset I'd realized that his passion for me had achieved previously unsuspected heights of romance!

Funny thing is, I'd already printed out a hard copy.

And Belo has a scanner.

Behold, the censored inteview in all its glory over at my brand new Flickr page.

Enjoy!

(T minus 48 hours 'til Auntie Sara's last post here!)

xoxo
Auntie Sara

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The Not My Boyfriend Club: Seth Herzog
3/29/2008 7:16:28 PM

Since I only have three more days to do those comedian profiles you so deeply love, I'm starting a new recurring feature. It is happening once, right now, today. It is called the Not My Boyfriend Club.

Seth Herzog is a comedian and an actor. He knows everybody in the New York alternative comedy scene and many people in the mainstream comedy scene and also lots of other people. Girls love him. He throws good parties and has an awesome belt buckle. He is very funny and he is a very good dancer. I like him. He is not my boyfriend, hence his membership in the prestigious Not My Boyfriend Club.

(Seth and Julia Allison, of the Internets. Photo by ...? at Julia Allison and designer Mary Rambin's birthday party.)

SJ100: Seth Herzog, how do you feel about being the inaugural member of the Not My Boyfriend Club?

Seth Herzog: Sara, I'm quite honored at being your first. I've never been anyone's first before. You always remember the first one. I'd be even more surprised if I was the first guy not to be your boyfriend, cause then you'd be very busy, giving you hardly enough time to conduct this interview.

SJ1000: Do you have a girlfriend?

Seth: Right now, I don't have a serious girlfriend, no. But I am involved with someone casually, who also has a very busy life. It's not complicated, and we try to keep in fun and effortless.

SJ1000: Why/why not?

Seth: Wow, this is getting personal. For the 'real' reason you may have to talk to my psychiatrist, but for right now, I can say that my life is fairly busy (like everyone in NY is) and I know from experience that having a serious girlfriend is something you have to be ready for and something that you can't do lightly. It takes some effort to do it right and make sure everyone's happy. So I'm waiting for someone to sweep me off my feet. But I'm not one of these people who need someone in their lives at all times. Being single is more my natural state. But as I get older (I'm 23) that is changing.

(Seth at a party run by those cool LVHRD people. Photo by Erin Sparling, from LVHRD.org)

SJ1000: I feel like you are a bachelor, a man-about-town, the fish who can't be caught. Am I right?

Seth: Hmm, that's almost flattering, I think. It's funny, cause you know me for only the last couple of years, and in very specific circumstances. I had a very serious girlfriend for three years before I met you. However, I'm open for you to project any issues or fantasies you have on to me. Think of me as your blank slate.

SJ1000: Do you think you will ever get married?

Seth: Yes, I imagine I will probably get married at some point. And although I have no plans to get married anytime soon, I feel like I've have put a fair amount of thought into what my wedding might be like. But I think it comes more from having gone to so many weddings and seeing what works and what doesn't than being obsessed with the idea of having to get married. Which I feel is a trap a lot of people get caught in and then get stuck in a marriage they don't want to be in (did I just get too preachy?)

In terms of marriage, right now I'm leaning towards some sort of elopement. Just you and your bride totally alone in a secluded place, maybe with some local shaman performing a ceremony in a language you've never heard before. So the ritual becomes solely about the two people sharing something together and where they can focus solely on each other, and its doesn't become about everyone else and the cake, the tables, the band, etc., etc.

Also, I may be the only guy who keeps a list of 'first dance' songs in his wallet. Its a very overlooked part of the wedding, and I think one of the most important parts.

SJ1000: Do you think you will ever have kids? You sing to kids, right? So does that mean you want to have them?

Seth: Oh I don't know. I like the idea of the kids (which everyone who doesn't have them does.) But I often see the reality of having kids is a big life change and can be huge drag. Every parent says that it's the best thing they've ever done. Which I'm sure is true, but a part of me thinks they are somehow now required to say that as part of some pact to convince non-parents to have kids. It's a conspiracy.

And I do not sing to kids. One of my duties is hosting a monthly kids rock show called KidRockers, where hip indie bands come and play their normal sets for kids and their hip parents. But I must admit dealing with all those kids each week is total treat and they are endlessly adorable.

(Photo by Maryanne Ventrice for KidRockers.)

SJ1000: What would you like to name your kids and/or wife? If she would let you name her. Which in some cultures probably would fly. So just be imaginative, is what I'm asking.

Seth: I've always been partial to the name "Shane". You've never met a dude named Shane who wasn't a good guy. It's not possible. "You need a place to stay for a while? Shane will let you crash at his place.", "Shane's got a van, he'll totally help you move."

Also, there's a tradition in my family about the men's names all having an S at the beginning, however, I think that name works well for either sex. In fact, male names on females I find incredibly sexy (not that I want to sexualize my non-existent daughter in any way). I also like Veronica, Luke, Jackson, Twiggy, Cher, and Sting.

In college I was sucker for any hot girl with an exotic name. For example, I lost my virginity to a girl named "Knight".

SJ1000: What is the best thing about not being my boyfriend?

Seth: There aren't many good things about not being your boyfriend. The only real positive thing I can think of is that I can date and explore all of the amazing, beautiful and fascinating creatures that are the women of NY without feeling guilty.

Oh, and I don't have to listen to your snoring.

SJ1000: Who else do you think should be in the Not My Boyfriend Club?

Seth: Oh, I don't know, maybe whoever you think is sexy. You can call this piece "They're not my boyfriend....yet." I would try to get to the bottom of some of America's more sexy and mysterious characters: Snuffleupagus or Steven Cojocaru.

SJ1000: Why should girls go out on dates with you, Seth Herzog?

Seth: This might a question that you could answer better than me.

1. I have a full set of teeth and all my limbs are intact (as of this printing).

2. I have a keen sense of humor, and I play well with others (at least that's what it said in 5th grade report progress report).

3. I'm devilishly handsome (at least that's what it says on my driver's license).

4. I enjoy a good, unironic night of karaoke (seriously). "What a Feeling" is my jam.

5. I always enjoy just listening to the minutiae of women's days (whether it's complaining about their job and how their friends all suck--its all good!)

SJ1000: Do these questions seem really scattered?

Seth: Actually not at all. They are seem to be focused like a laser on my love life. It certain point it feels like a phone call from my mother.

(Seth and his mom, who performs with him every Tuesday on his show, SWEET, at the Slipper Room in Manhattan. Photo by Maryanne Ventrice, whose work was recently featured in Penthouse!)

SJ1000: Have you ever gone on a Hooksexup date? What about any kind of an Internet date?

Seth: I have never gone on a 'Hooksexup date'. I've only visited the site a few times, but I was in the pilot they did for HBO about 10 years ago. I'm not on any dating sites at all. However, one time a girl who saw me perform live then found me on Friendster (which goes to show you how long ago this happened) asked me out. We then proceded to commence a very sexy several month fling. That's the closest I've thing I've ever had to an 'internet date'.

SJ1000: When I say "hooksexup.com" what is the first word that springs to mind?

Seth: RUFUS or "Intell-sexuals"

SJ1000: When I say "Sara Benincasa" what are the first eleven words that spring to mind?

Seth: "How-can-I-get-this-gorgeous-bundle-of-talent-into-bed?"

SJ1000: What are your secrets of seduction? Share them with the desparate masses!

Seth: Basically: Listen more than you talk, and be genuinely interested in the other person. When you are first meeting someone (unless you click immediately), wait til you can tell you've slightly piqued their interest, then walk away. They'll find you.

That's one for the kids.

[To see more of Seth, you should do a Flickr search with his name. It yields much fruit. Also a Google image search. Also you should go to his weekly show, Sweet, at the Slipper Room at 167 Orchard Street in NYC, Tuesday nights at 8:30 PM. Doors at 8:00 PM. $5. Worth it.)

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GET ME TO 10 BEFORE I GO!!!
3/29/2008 7:13:53 PM

Hey kids,

Since I'm leaving you forever on Tuesday, wouldn't it be fun to artificially inflate my rating just in time for me to go?

Give me your tens, your hungry, your wretched masses yearning to give me a ten!

Rate me higher than you want, higher than you think I deserve, and higher than my emotional age.

Give me a ten!

Love,
Uncle Papa

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Quel Scandal!
3/22/2008 11:20:18 AM

Hello my darlings. I'm off to San Frangaysco after a trying week of intense bathtub-related controversy. SuperDeluxe kindly did an interview with me for their blog in which they allowed me to (brilliantly, I feel) present my argument that Craig Bierko is deeply secretly in love with me, which is why he ripped off my show, "Tub Talk with Sara B." for his new show on SuperDeluxe, "Bathing with Bierko."

And then they took my interview down!

I assume it had to do with the fact that Bierko was horrified and embarrassed by my calling him out and revealing his deep passion for me to the world.

Or the fact that SuperDeluxe honchos don't want to piss off their only freelance contract employee who has yet been able to get John Malkovich in a bathtub on camera.

It's okay. I get it. It's a combination of corporate policy and Craig Bierko's deep, undying love for me.

Sigh.

Off to do shows in San Francisco Monday night at the Octavia Lounge. I'm fairly terrified of the long flight, as I haven't taken a flight this long in years...anywayskovitz, wish me luck and love and a decided lack of crippling panic attacks or mental health crises.

I'm bringing Xanax. And Clonopin. And breathing exercises (printed on New Agey cards.) And Celestial Seasonings peppermint teabags. And the musical stylings of Enya. And my Debbie Gibson concert t-shirt from 1989.

That should help.

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