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Please Advise: Am I in love, or am I just high?

Hooksexup readers weigh in on one woman’s problems with love and other drugs.

Each week, the inbox of our venerable advice columnist, Miss Information, is flooded with queries. And although she makes a valiant effort, she cannot answer them all. To deal with the surplus, we've decided to turn to you. So, don your spectacles and help this woman out. You can give her advice in the comments below, or, if you'd like to share what you wrote with your friends, on our Facebook page.

Dear Hooksexup,

I smoked weed for the first time at the beginning of September, with a guy I barely knew. We were both studying at nearby community colleges, met online, and really hit it off. Over the course of our friendship, I would drive thirty minutes from my house to his. We would smoke his bong and just hang out in his backyard. We never had sex, but we would hug it out whenever I was leaving. I don't know if he saw me as a potential hook-up, but I wouldn’t have minded. (Getting high makes me really horny, and I loved spending time with him one-on-one anyway.)

I live with my parents; recently, they found my stash and I got read the riot act for it. Later that night, I texted my friend for moral support, and he got angry at me for even mentioning marijuana on the phone — he could get arrested, he could lose his medical-marijuana card, it's my problem, not his, etc. I was surprised by how hurt and betrayed I felt. I told him he was a cold-hearted asshole, to which he responded with a novel of texts. I ended the night crying my eyes out.

The morning after, he texted me saying that he doesn't know why I got so pissed at him. I don't know what to do. Are my feelings for him going beyond friendship? Is my love of smoking pot clouding my judgment? Was his behavior over the line? And finally, should I put some distance between me and the pipe or just me and my friend?

— Half Baked

What say you, readers? Is she confusing one high for another? Is her friend one toke over the line? Or should she find another hook-up (in more ways than one)?

Commentarium (85 Comments)

Oct 05 11 - 11:31pm
Frederick Douglass

grrl! ur problem obvi has nothing 2 do with the purp, dro, and/or nugz of dank u have been chiefin with ur sexy new boi! obvi ur parents r not 420 friendly! u need 2 push these negative vibes out of ur life! ne1 who does not accept ur new chill lifestyle is not worth having in ur life! u should tell ur parents that 'getting lifted' is just part of who u r now! ax ur new boi if u can move in and chill with him and his bong!! best wishes 2 u! stay blazin!!

Oct 05 11 - 11:38pm
Stephen A. Douglas

You loose-minded charlatan! This poor girl's parents are only acting in her best interests, attempting to save her from the devilish herb that claims thousands of lives daily! Do you want to see her shack up with this drug-addled parasite? Young lady, I can only pray that you have not consumed enough of "Satan's Spinach" to become a "junkie"! I see them every day on the streets, begging for change, their teeth rotted from their skulls by the noxious fumes of the dreaded plant. Repent now!

Oct 06 11 - 1:43am


Oct 06 11 - 2:39am

@Stephen A. Douglas BRAVO SIR. Brrrravo.

Oct 06 11 - 10:06am
Alex Heigl

This... was in no way helpful but deeply entertaining.

Oct 06 11 - 10:21am

@Fred - can we get that again please, this time in English? Or perhaps you've had one too many bongs to construct an intelligible sentence...

Oct 06 11 - 12:28pm

@RedVamp - you are a moron. quickly google those names and see if you can understand why. I understand that you wanted an opportunity to use your word of the day calendar find, "intelligible," but...fuck. dumbass.

Oct 06 11 - 1:17pm

Firstly, which names do you want me to Google, cos there's a fair few in this thread?Secondly, regardless of how that Google search might enlighten me, are you trying to tell me that you *don't* find reading a paragraph like Fred's painfully irritating? He has an opinion, he by all means should share it, but if he did so in a way that felt less like deciphering graffiti scrawled on the side of a boxcar, it would be easier to take that opinion seriously. I'm no fucking genius, I don't write like a brilliant wordsmith and i don't attempt to, and i don't expect other people to write as though they're submitting their message for assessment by a team of literary snobs, but Jesus Christ, is it that hard to use even basic English skills?

And I'm pretty sure 'intelligible' is fairly simple and common word used by people other than dumbasses with a Word of The Day calendar... I don't exactly sit and analyse every Goddamn word i use, i just use the one that gets my point across and that doesn't reed lyk dis.

Oct 06 11 - 1:34pm

I'm glad you can "analyse" words, but you should pick up a history book when you make it to the 8th grade.

As for the girl with the problem: your friend was probably really, REALLY high when you texted him. You'll find out what that feels like eventually - smoke too much when your mind ain't right and you'll be right paranoid. And I'm pretty sure your parents smoked pot at least once, too.

Oct 06 11 - 4:51pm

@RedVamp: Frederick Douglass and Stephen Douglas were anti- and pro-slavery activists around the time of the Civil War, to extremely reduce their respective positions. THE COMMENT WAS A FUCKING JOKE. The commenter used Frederick Douglass' (an extremely eloquent speaker) to make a stereotypically "ghetto" post about smoking weed, and then immediately responded to it using "proper" english voiced through one of Douglass' similarly-named rivals from the same time. That's why I told you to Google those handles; a 30-second search and Wiki scan and you could have been chortling along with the rest of us instead of proving that you're a moron.

@hac, I don't think he's a troll. I think he's an idiot.

Oct 07 11 - 3:10am

Bahahahaaa..... ah, I see! That is pretty fucking funny. No, I don't know a whole lot about history, I'm an animal attendant - all my studies were focused in a different area entirely, but I'm always happy to learn and am certainly not too proud to eat humble pie when i'm wrong. Apologies, ya funny bastard.

Reading that kind of writing just makes me cringe, so I got all stabby before considering that you may have just been being clever. You have to admit, there aren't too many occasions when that type of writing turns out to be a joke from someone clever.... it's usually just someone far too lazy to construct a half-decent sentence. After seeing it day in and day out for so long, I've gotten to the point where I see red the moment a paragraph like that pops up.

Again, apologies for snapping.

Oct 07 11 - 9:58am

Resolved! No hard feelings and we're all laughing. Literally the first time I've seen a comment thread back and forth go well. I'm sorry I called you a moron.

Oct 07 11 - 9:14pm

this is the best thread. funny + heartwarming + informative. Also, that chick should move out of her parent's house so she can smoke moar weed. real problem solver.

Oct 09 11 - 2:25am

love it, and from now on I'm only ever going to refer to weed as satan's spinach :D

Oct 09 11 - 9:46am

oh you funny you.

comment thread op: i get the 'shortcuts' within txtspk, but half the time i wonder how people got from 'to' to '2'..doesn't the break/differences in between numeral and alpha placements bother you??

2nd op: Lol. that screams of 'old', 'devoted christian' and uh 'narrowmindedness'. sorry.
not that doing drugs or smoking,(suicidal, cutting, bulemia--oh these come hand in hand) is Good for you. i solemnly swearr that i've never done any of them. just saying people usually have their reasons--seemingly shallow they may be. thus if it est something they enjoy and indulge in the moment, who are we to tell them what to do. not that they would actually listen(or be even listening..) if said indulgence had already reached 'unhealthy and incomprehensible' levels. =/

Oct 05 11 - 11:39pm

ASK UR PARENTS TO FORGIVE U! This guy sounds like he wants to get u hooked on drugs and turn u into a prostitute! Be careful! Have you noticed any missing memories? He might b getting u high and then selling ur body while ur under the effects of the drugs! U should call the cops right now! If u dont then I will!!

Oct 06 11 - 12:21am

I find your ideas intriguing and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

Oct 06 11 - 12:52am

Boomer. You dry wit makes my day.

On the of chance that wasn't sarcasm.....whoops!

Oct 06 11 - 12:57pm


Oct 06 11 - 1:55pm

word, sir. word.

Oct 05 11 - 11:40pm

I first smoked pot with my best friend. I would later lose my virginity to the same boy. We had sober days together too, upon my request. Partly because I was tired of having conversations that didn't make sense later, and partly because he was smoking all my weed. I think you guys should have some sober days together, and see how you feel about him then. Weed is great and all, but if he is using it medically, like I do, he may not see it the same way you do. If you had gotten his weed taken away, you could seriously screw up his life. I know I would not be able to function properly without my Medical Marijuana (Not because I'm a stoner, but because I have severe juvenile arthritis). I wish I didn't HAVE to smoke a few times a week, but it's my medicine. He may feel the same way, and you may be helping him enjoy treatment. OR he's one of the stoners that uses the Medical system to get high, if so, that's cool, but he needs to chill the fuck out, because he can easily go to a dealer without having the worry of not having the medicine that makes him able to function. Did that make sense? If you're wondering, yes, I am stoned right now.

Oct 06 11 - 12:53am

It made total sense.

Oct 06 11 - 6:54pm

+1 SB

Oct 05 11 - 11:41pm

my mom says weed gives you really bad gas. maybe this is why your parents are mad? are you stinking up the house? idk just a thought.

Oct 06 11 - 10:48am

That technically doesn't make a lick of sense. Why would smoke make you have gas?

Oct 06 11 - 1:01pm

It happens. Uh, so I've heard...

Oct 06 11 - 6:55pm

You're pasted, mofo. What a crock.

Oct 06 11 - 9:02pm

Aerophagia, or the process of "swallowing air" happens when you smoke, chew gum, have drinks with straws, etc, and that act of "swallowing air" results in the gas moving down into your stomach and then getting expelled as gas, so your mom is partially right CB23 ... but it's not exclusive to smoking weed.

Oct 09 11 - 9:57am

touche. i had a real stomach ache recently and my sister suggested 'chewing some gum'. real baffled moment. kinda eye opening. but turns out it was Just a stomach ache. unfortunately.

Oct 06 11 - 12:19am

So a friend of yours, with which you smoke weed, was pissed you called him after a shitty event in your life? Dude's being a wang. But that doesn't mean you didn't over react to his over reaction.
Give him another chance and if you do want to bone him let him know it. Then go home and find a way, way better place to stash your weeds.

In short, you gotta hit it to quit it, so touch his dick between bong rips.

Oct 06 11 - 6:30am

I was going to re-evaluate my relationship by asking strangers on the Internet for advice...

but then I got high.

Nah, guy sounds like a dickhead though. Dump him and keep smoking weed, cos it's awesome. For a stoner, this dude is way too high-strung. There are tons of laid-back folks out there.

Oct 06 11 - 9:06pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

He is way too high-strung. He's like a version of me, if I were high-strung. But I'm not. So there.

Oct 06 11 - 7:53am

Also, man. You're still living with your folks and you didn't store it properly? We aren't in high school anymore, you need to think this shit through. (Actually, high schoolers are ingenious at hiding things from their parents) The point is, if your parents ever go into your room, and they aren't chill too, then you've got to actually hide it. No sock drawer shit either.

Oct 06 11 - 9:06am

Well, community college is practically high school.

Oct 06 11 - 9:08pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

Dude, my desk has a lock on it. And a secret passage through the walls of the desk. Ain't no etchy sketch. And community college is way better than high school. I live too close to my school that it would be pointless to have my own place.

Oct 06 11 - 11:14pm

It's cool to live with your folks, that's not the thing, but they have to trust you. Especially since you're an adult. Now you've pretty much lost their trust, so you're going to have to be creative with your stash. Parents who go through stuff suck, but locking things up usually tips them off.

Oct 06 11 - 8:57am

Love the reader comments on this! As for the writer, it's really your life and your decision on how you want to live it. I'd say just don't send text messages about illegal activities, and never, ever, conduct extended highly emotional conversations via SMS. You both lose out on all the cues you'd pick up if you were talking to each other.

Oct 06 11 - 9:09pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

Thanks, JCF.

Oct 06 11 - 10:44am

A few thoughts/ideas:
1) Text messages don't hang around on servers for more than a day or two. He should've just deleted the message, and asked you not to discuss such things via text.
1a) Who is, Scarface? No one's watching his stupid phone unless he's all ready in legal trouble.

2) Smoking weed is really fun, and it's offered me a much different perspective on life over the years. That said, it can make you paranoid (it certainly seems to have done that for your friend) and it can be a huge time waster. Are you keeping up with your studies, your job, and your other friends?

3) As for your parents, I hate to say it, but you probably shouldn't keep weed in their house. I had to stay with my mom over the summer, and I just abstained. If you can, store it in your car, or with a trusted friend, or move out. I don't think it's a big deal, but there are severe consequences if you get caught.

4) I don't know, that guy kind of sounds like a jerk. But that's for you to decide.

Oct 06 11 - 10:50am

Yes, a paranoid jerk. I have a card, I'm not worried about being hauled off to jail. He needs to grow some balls.

Oct 06 11 - 9:11pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

I second that, S. A freakin paranoid jerk.

Oct 06 11 - 11:45am

It sounds like an overreaction, but it's good policy to not talk about drugs
a.on the phone
b. in email
c. in text messages
d. and especially on facebook

yes it's paranoid, but you are doing something illegal so using digression when talking about it is a good policy. also sorry you had to deal with angry parents about it, that is a very unpleasant conversation.

Oct 06 11 - 10:43pm

I think you meant "using discretion," but I like the idea of using digression to keep him off the topic.

Him: "So I was thinking we might roll a joi--"

Oct 07 11 - 10:09am

victimized by firefox spellcheck again

Oct 09 11 - 6:03am

@well Very well played.

Oct 06 11 - 12:04pm

You're living at home, you're in community college, you're smoking weed and spending time with a guy who spends his time in his backyard doing bong rips?

Your biggest issue is not whether it's worth it to invest more time with a guy who flipped out on you when he thought he could lose his weed hook up. Give yourself a sober week or two to think about how long you want to stay in the situation you're in. If the answer isn't "indefinitely," give yourself another sober week or two to figure out what steps you need to take to get wherever you want to go.

I'm sure it comes through that I'm not a fan of habitual smoking. My friends and I are all slipping towards 30, and I'm watching a bunch of them come to the end of years of daily/multi-weekly smoking. Most of them are realizing that they responded to the stress of making decisions about their lives by smoking away the anxiety that accompanies ambition, and now have way less money, stability, and healthy relationships than they'd like. I guess in short, I'm saying to go forth and smoke, but please don't let it get in the way of other things that'll make you happy in the long run.

Oct 06 11 - 12:22pm

Best advice so far. Agree and can relate.

Oct 06 11 - 1:09pm

Yeah, I think you're projecting more than a bit. She's in college, and gave no indication that her grades are suffering due to her smoking. So she is working towards something better. She hadn't started smoking habitually before she landed living with her rents and in community college, so clearly it is not the cause of these problems, and there is no sign it is really worsening them other than what you assume to be true. I'm definitely not saying that there aren't people who let weed get in the way of their future -- but what you've read into this letter, and this woman, is really not there.

Oct 06 11 - 12:08pm

Um, obviously drug dealers don't appreciate direct references to their profession wirelessly. And he's a stoner dude. They never make the first move.

Also, chill with this guy sober. If you don't like him, then you just like his drugs.

Oct 06 11 - 9:14pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

It's entirely impossible to chill with this guy sober. And he calls himself a good Christian... jerk.

Oct 06 11 - 1:27pm

If you loved him, you'd know. You are certainly attracted to him and that's fine, but it doesn't sound as if you have enough space to figure out what you should do next. Yes, put space between you and they guy and you and the pipe. If, after 6 months, you want either or both of them back, it will make sense. If he asks why there is distance, tell him that school is killing you and you'd love to grab a cup of coffee when things lighten up. I get that you're young and 6 months may seem like forever, but it's not. It's just a solid amount of time to get perspective.

Oct 06 11 - 9:15pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

Thank you so much for this. THIS kind of advice makes me a little happier after the death of Steve Jobs and that creepy Cupertino shooter is gone too.

Oct 06 11 - 4:11pm

1) As people have mentioned before, pot can make a person paranoid.

2) Is he dealing? Drug dealers tend to be more paranoid, and with good reason. Yes, most electronic communications are monitored. The agencies that monitor them are not interested in recreational drug users, but they are interested in dealers. As someone who lived with a drug dealer in college, my best advice is to stay away from him.

3) Next time you want to communicate with a friend you're crushing on, make a phone call. Just do it. You don't raise his opinion of you by texting.

Oct 06 11 - 9:17pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

He's dealing. He uses WeedMaps to get more connections.

Part of me wants to stay very far away from him, but another part of me wants to get to know him when he's sober. And I'll try that, phone calls are something I want to get to do more often with people I'm crushing on.

Oct 06 11 - 5:19pm

I don't even care about the pot stuff. He wasn't there for you when you were upset, in fact, he made it worse. And he never apologized for being an asshole. He's just a bad friend. Ditch him and move on.

Oct 06 11 - 8:40pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

Thank you so much for this. He is such an asshole.

Oct 06 11 - 5:24pm

if you like smoking weed, smoke it. if you like the guy, give him another chance, if he's a jerk again, find new people to smoke with who are more chill! and I agree with Eric don't try to have serious conversations or arguments over text, that's just stupid.

Oct 06 11 - 9:18pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

Aahhh. I do want to give him another chance, but I think the timing is very off right now.

Oct 13 11 - 6:57pm

Why? You haven't pointed out anything good about him except that being with him is one hell of a lot better than being home with your parents. Make a list of HIS good points, and you enjoying fucking him is not HIS good point. I have the feeling you could do better.

Oct 06 11 - 5:25pm

I'll echo AML, nearly all the regular pot smokers I know really are robbed of ambition and drive. Lots more low paying jobs & just getting by compared to the careers being built by the non smokers. Correlation or Causation, I don't know, but it seems true more often than not.

Hmm, it always seems that the ones with "Medical" marijuana cards are the ones who were smoking it already.

Oct 06 11 - 6:58pm

Sorry M. I've been smokin' for 35 years. I'm a reasonably successful white-collar information professional. Your argument doesn't validate. It's just a recreational drug, like alcohol. Harmless if used in moderation. Emphasis on 'in moderation'.

Oct 06 11 - 9:51pm


Oct 06 11 - 8:41pm

If I had a dollar for every guy I hugged after smoking with them and/or for every time my parents found my stash when I lived with them....I would be making more money than I am as a Ph.D. candidate.

People like to smoke weed with other people. It's a nice gesture to hug people when they leave, it does not mean you want to have passionate slow sex. Plus, unless you took a rip right before you hit the road, you probably weren't super high when you did hug. Therefore, making your hugs even more platonic. Weed has the tendancy make you horny, more talkative, and open minded to conversation. So, yes... I think you thought wrong about the love interest.

He was insensitive, but you texted him and did scare him too. You young kids and texting, if you put LOL or a :) in there then I really have no sympathy for you either. Some things are lost in translation. It's not his fault you didn't hide your stash well, but maybe he took it personal. I'm sure he would of been more sympathetic if you told him person. If he's someone like me, getting caught by your parents isn't that big of a deal. I mean if medical marijuana is allowed in your state, and you got caught with a personal stash they write you a ticket. The cops wouldn't even come to your house if you parents asked them to. Just keep a job, do well in school, don't be pushing pounds of weed, and I'm sure they'll get over it.

I say to figure shit out.... smoke some pot with other people. If you have the same feelings you do with another person, maybe it is the weed clouding your judgement and you'll end up falling in love with every single stoner! You should probably try to do something else than hang out in this guys backyard. You can smoke pot at a concert, at the beach, or hiking in a mountain eating granola together.

Oct 06 11 - 10:03pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

I always took a big hit before I left his house.

And thanks for the last paragraph.

Oct 06 11 - 8:47pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

Oh, and, I am definitely not giving this guy a second chance. He's bad news, ladies and gentlemen. Something about him is not right. Something in his brain is just not working correctly. He may seem like a kind guy when he's sober, but he really is a cold hearted asshole. He doesn't care about me and honestly, I don't give a fondling fuck about him. I'm truly disgusted of myself and the high memories I had with him last month. And he's not even that sick or has an actual illness to have a medical marijuana card! I could have just gotten high with myself..

Oct 06 11 - 9:18pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

Ahhhhhhhh. Someone shoot me. I need to make my mind up. FOR REALZ.

Oct 07 11 - 2:21pm



Oct 07 11 - 5:36pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

Aww thanks Russo.

Oct 07 11 - 3:21am

Find some new people to hang out with/smoke with. It's always helpful to have options and if you are that hung up on staying friends with this guy even after he was insensitive, you probably could do with a few more.

Oct 07 11 - 5:37pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

Thanks Cheez.

Oct 07 11 - 9:54am

First world problem.

Oct 07 11 - 9:59am


Oct 10 11 - 10:33am


Oct 07 11 - 4:57pm

People, especially young people, really don't have a realistic view of how marijuana really is a counterproductive drug. This young lady appears to have gotten high and been in her own little 'high zone' and unable to relate to what was really occurring. Marijuana use causes people to use very poor judgement and decision making skills. Oh well, at least she's in Montana where it is okay to use 'medically' (what a freakin' joke the medical marijuana scam is!).

Oct 07 11 - 5:37pm
I am the AUTHOR!!!

Montana? I live in California..

Oct 08 11 - 1:10am

This guy sounds like a real doucher. I would highly suggest not dating a dealer on principle alone, but any guy who wigs out that much over a text message is really heaping it on. You'll find that trouble is always two steps away when you spend your time hanging out with somebody who's life revolves around selling something they're not supposed to be.

Also, I'm willing to concede that marijuana isn't the great evil it's made out to be, but it still has a way of becoming a lifestyle. I think what South Park has had to say about pot has been pretty on target. Booze has a way of doing that to some people too, but it's legal, for better or worse.

Oct 10 11 - 6:39am

This guy is playing cool but deep inside he's aching to grab you. He wants to get you hooked on drugs via marijuana and have you anytime he wants. Believe me, he's done it with other girls...he's a shy type who doesn't have the guts to make a move for fear of rejection. Stay far away, my girl...

Oct 10 11 - 12:33pm
J Stacks

There is nothing worse than an uptight, asshole stoner. That’s like a Buddist who is cruel to animals or an over-priced escort who is peevish and preoccupied (aren’t they the worst??). The pertinent issues here, however, are not about the kush, parents, texts, or studying. The real point in question is why you feel the need to drive 30 minutes to go hang out in a backyard with a tool you met online. Surely there are cooler people and places for puffing down, right?? Community Colleges are rife with all kinds of cool kids, so why get hung up on some callous agro-douche?? If you are cool & cute, come hang out over here and enjoy the finest selection of herb, edibles, extract, etc.

Oct 10 11 - 10:17pm

It sounds like there are a number of different issues here. One thing you need to come to terms with is that some people FREAK out about weed and if you don't feel like dealing with their freakouts you'll want to fine-tune your ability to be discreet. This goes for your parents as much as for your friend.
Second of all; yes your judgment is probably a bit clouded though not necessarily because of the weed. It might also have to do with your age or with the new pressures you're dealing with. Weed might be clouding your judgment though so don't dismiss the idea of taking a month-long break from smoking sometime to take a look at your life from that perspective.
Thirdly, about your feelings for this guy; if you're attracted to him you should make a move. The worst thing that can happen is he doesn't feel the same way and things become awkward - but then again things are already awkward for you all sitting there, high, wanting to do stuff with him... Heck maybe he wants you just as much but gets inhibited when he smokes or something.

Oct 13 11 - 6:51pm

Er, I may be too fucking ripped, but what's the problem with calling the Magna Carta the Magna Carta?

Oct 13 11 - 6:55pm

@mai_b, this guy/asshole doesn't have the maturity to survive six months of space. Further, "I am the AUTHOR!!!" has yet to say anything that suggest this guy is anything but a loser. Move on, girl, move on!

Oct 13 11 - 9:50pm

Just high.

Oct 17 11 - 10:13pm

Pot doesn't really make people fall in love, you probably actually like the guy. Sounds like he's not really worth it though, bummer. Try hanging out with him and specifically request that you not smoke pot together and that neither one of you are high. It's totally ok, i had to do this only with booze and a friend recently for the same reasons. If he cares about you, he'll at least be down to spend time sober with you, then you can see if you really like him or are just high. If he says no way or gets high anyway when you ask him to stay sober for your hanging time, he's a jackhole who dosen't give two shits. Use him for his pot stash and move on.

Oct 18 11 - 10:47pm

I'm personally against the use of drugs but this is not the problem here.The problem is that you don't know what's going on in this dude's head,when he is high.He may like you and give you signals,but only when he is high.And this is a problem.You should be able to hang out with him on a coffee or to the cinema sober and he should be able to send you the same signals.He already blew one out of the park,by being a paranoid jerk,when he was sober,so keep your eyes open.Give him two more strikes at the most.If he continues being a jerk,he was never nice to you - it was the drugs.If he actually turns around and starts treating you right,he was simply scared the first time around,he made a mistake,it will get better.

Nov 09 11 - 8:07pm

NO. The issue that you speek of is an one way deal, get out or learn to live with it.