The Three Stooges hits theaters today, and having lost Sean Penn and Jim Carrey as possible Stooges, the film needed a little controversy to help spark interest. Right on cue, enter Catholic League president Bill Donohue, who makes his living fecklessly complaining about cultural products we unreservedly enjoy. It seems Donohue has a problem with the way nuns are portrayed in the new movie, courtesy of SI swimsuit model Kate Upton and Larry David.
Upton has a cameo as Sister Bernice, who's seen wearing a black lace "nun-kini," along with a wimple and rosary. Here's part of Donohue's usual statement:
"In the 1950s, Hollywood generally avoided crude fare and was respectful of religion. Today it specializes in crudity and trashes Christianity, especially Catholicism. Enter the The Three Stooges. This movie is not just another remake: it is a cultural marker of sociological significance, and what it says about the way we've changed is not encouraging…the TV show never mocked nuns or showed infants urinating in the face of the Stooges. The film does."
Donohue's right; the '50s are long gone, but sexy nuns are a lot more appealing than scary ruler-wielding nuns greedily eyeing up young, unscarred knuckles.
The Catholic League prez also had a problem with Larry David's role as Sister Mary-Mengele, named after a certain Nazi war criminal. (What does he expect from the guys who brought us that special "hair gel" in There's Something About Mary?) Donohue was irked by some recent comments David made to Conan O'Brien regarding the role, but it seems he's been on Donohue's radar for some time now. According to Big Bill:
"In 2009, David proved what he thinks about Catholics when he was shown going to the bathroom in a Catholic home spattering urine on a picture of Jesus (it was his own show). Last night he said to Conan O'Brien that dressing as a nun in the film makes it easy to understand why nuns are "so mean." He explains, 'You know, the outfits might have something to do with that. Forget about the fact that they never have sex. If you gave me a choice of no sex or having to wear that outfit the rest of my life, I would definitely take the no sex."
With his easily-offended sensibilities, Donohue must have a lot on his plate these days. Luckily, another right-wing group took care of that penis-cup story.
