Talking to Strangers

Hooksexup asks deeply personal questions to people we just met.

 

Petra, 23

What do you do?
I'm unemployed. But I was a cocktail waitress.

That must've gotten you laid often.
No. Well... yeah.

So what type of guy are you into?
I really don't have a type. Well, badasses. I guess I'm the typical kind of girl who likes a bad boy. It is lame, but it's true.

How's your sex life right now?
I'm single right now, post-long-relationship.

Lots of one-night stands?
It's inevitable. I go to a bar, I get drunk or something. And if I'm horny, then it happens.

Then the magic happens.
And then I disappear.

Tell me about the craziest sex you've ever had.
I have a few. One time I had sex with my boyfriend in a graveyard, on a grave.

Did you know the deceased?
No — that would be awful!

What else?
I had sex in a handicapped bathroom stall at the Fox and the Hound. Twice.

Now that's a good idea, because they're roomy. How about the best sex?
This is going to sound cheesy, but the best sex I've ever had was with my ex, during a thunderstorm, after we had gotten in a fight. I was punching him while I was fucking him, and it was thunderstorming outside, and I'm screaming, "You fucker!" and there's all this lightning. That was the best sex I've ever had.

And the most epic.
It was really good.

 

Mark, 30

What's your job?
I work for Bank of America. Card issuance — everything that has to do with getting plastic in the mail.

So tell me about your dating life — are you seeing somebody right now?
I'm single. It's great. I love it. I can do whatever I want. I don't have to answer to anybody.

Let's say you're at a bar, and you see a good-looking girl. How do you approach her?
I was just talking to her — you scared her away.

I'm sorry! But now you can be like, "Oh man, that guy was an asshole," and talk about that. I'm a conversation starter, that's what I am. But how do you pick up a girl?
Just be natural, casual. Walk over, say hello. None of that cheesy-pickup-line stuff.

What kind of girls are you into?
Brunettes, but don't tell that blonde I was just talking to. She was cute, but blonde.

So if you could compare relationship sex versus one-night-stand sex, how do they stack up?
Well, it's two totally different things. In a relationship it's harder to be yourself because you're putting on a face for someone else, and with a one-night stand you don't care because you're never going to see the person again. But with a one-night stand you were probably drunk, so you don't really remember it.

How do you feel about the walk of shame?
I mean, that doesn't really exist for guys. For girls, it's like, "Oh, God, I'm so embarrassed." For guys, it's like a strut.

 

Hannah-Claire, 24

Did I hear you say you're from Chicago?
Yeah.

So why did you choose Philly?
I've always wanted to live here. Chicago is a great city, but it's weird that nothing is old there. There's no history. That's what really attracted me to Philadelphia, all the history. And I'm really into art — I went to art school.

So do you have crazy artist sex?
I don't know if it's crazy, but when I was in school I couldn't have a stable relationship because everyone I was with, I thought of as competition. "I like you, but are you a good artist?" Dating was so weird in Chicago, which is part of why I left.

What do you mean?
Well, school was like seventy percent women, thirty percent men, and half the guys were gay. So guys had it so much easier. The guys went from being the nerdy art kid in high school to being king of the pond.

That's what happened to me — I was a total loser in high school, and then I went to art school and didn't know how to handle not being a loser. Did you ever have a relationship in college?
I did, but it wasn't that great. I dated the guy for about a year. But I've been dating and single for about four years now.

So, you have lots of sex?
Maybe, I don't know. I think I do.

Well, how often are we talking?
It's been since July right now. Which is pretty normal.

So are you just not a very sexual person?
No, I think I'm really sexual. When I'm with somebody, I'm super-physical, but I'm also really picky. I'm a perfectionist at heart, so sometimes if I have a one-night stand I feel really bad about it for some reason. Maybe I shouldn't have done that. Maybe that wasn't classy. That morning-after regret. The walk of shame.

What's the lamest date you've ever been on?
It was this super-awkward date because neither one of us was going to end it, so it ended up lasting all day. We went to the art museum and it was awkward. The guy was really shy. And he was a DJ, and he told me he was DJ-ing at a block party, and asked me if I wanted to come. I said yes, so I'm just standing there like, "Okay..." And then we went to dinner, and then he insisted on walking me back home, which is insane because I live in South Philly and we were in Chinatown. So I agreed. And when we got back, I said I was going to walk my dog, and he was like, "Oh, I'll walk your dog with you!" and I was totally uncomfortable but I said okay.

I would have just told him to get out of there.
I feel bad that I didn't. But I'm not the kind of person that can be mean to somebody.