I liked Thomas Moore's comment that one of the main problems with sex and religion is recognizing that all human relationships however intense, romantic, erotic and/or spiritual have their limitations. American romantic sex has totally unrealistic expectations of the knight in shining armor who rescues the fair, snow-white princess so the twin pack can fly off to ever-ever land. When the amphetamine high of being limerent, "in love," slows down or crashes into reality, we race off in search of a new, more satisfying adventure. The personal issue for every human is not what a particular religion teaches about sex and spirit, but whether or not the individual admits her/his finiteness, his/her need for transcendence, for bonding with the earth that births us, and for creative, life-giving communion with others and the "Ultimate." Being human, at least in this life, means always being on a pilgrimage, always searching for that ultimate fulfillment.
So I agree with Moore when he says that to be a good Christian, Jew, Protestant, Buddhist, Hindu, whatever, "all we have to do is be an honest, generous, present partner" and "our spiritual lives will increase." That to me requires the openness of a child to the potential of our on-going creation. Recognize that our sexual desire is never fulfilled with a human partner, but then accept joyfully our sexual vulnerability, and that can be a way of opening up to a deeper and vaster kind of love and connection. Maybe we don't have to spiritualize our sexuality, maybe we just need the courage to be an honest, generous and present partner.
Francoeur responds to Paglia and Kissling
©1999 Robert Francoeur and hooksexup.com
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