Advice

Sex Advice From Strippers

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heather

Hezzy, 23

Why are strippers better in bed?
It is a stripper's job to be sexy and seduce people — we are pretty damn good at it. Also, we have phenomenal wardrobes.

I want to put on a little strip show for my boyfriend's birthday, but I'm nervous that I'll just end up looking ridiculous. What should I do to make sure it goes off without a hitch?
Move much slower than you think you should. It's a fine line between sexy and epileptic seizure. Lots of eye contact is always hot, and just do what feels natural. Don't "try" to be sexy. It doesn't work that way. And if you're nervous, definitely have a drink. That's what I do!

How can I pick up a stripper?
If you met her at the club, you can't. You're already a customer to her. Otherwise, just be an exceptionally nice guy. Strippers have heard it all and deal with "charming" douchebags all night long.

Is a stripper pole in the bedroom worth the investment?
Yes! If you really want to learn, you have to fall down and make a fool out of yourself a lot so it helps to be able to do that in the privacy of your own home. And once you've learned, it will definitely spice up your sex life.

What makes a good blowjob?
Getting into a position that is most comfortable for you so you don't get tired is key. Eye contact, dirty talk, actually enjoying yourself, lots of moisture, and using both of your hands as well (don't forget the balls and taint!).

I've got a fantasy about boning a cheerleader. What can I say to my normally vanilla girlfriend to convince her to dress up for me?
If you have to convince your girlfriend to dress up for you, dump her. She should want to do it! If you've already bought the outfit for her, that would definitely make her feel more inclined to do it.

How long should you wait before sleeping with a guy?
I don't think it matters. Some people think sleeping with a guy too quickly will make him not respect you, but if he doesn't respect you, it's because he is a douchebag, not because you slept with him. If you want to fuck him, fuck him!

rocket

Rocket, 28

www.rocketisrad.com

What has stripping taught you about dating?
Don't make snap judgments based on first impressions. I've really hit it off with someone after that initial awkward nervous phase wore off. In the strip club, the guy in the designer suit with the flashy rolex watch might be a total cheapskate. The guy in the camo hunting gear who is missing teeth might spend a small fortune on you.

I want to put on a little strip show for my boyfriend's birthday, but I'm nervous that I'll just end up looking ridiculous. What should I do to make sure it goes off without a hitch?
Choose slow music, and move deliberately. Wear an outfit that is easy to remove, but has lots of things to play with: zippers, buttons, ribbon ties, buckles. It builds anticipation. And make a lot of seductive eye contact!

Is a stripper pole in the bedroom worth the investment? Why or why not?
I don't think so. But a lap-dance chair is a great idea! Tip: Ikea makes great chairs and couches for this purpose. Somehow all of their stuff is at the perfect height for different positions.

I've got a fantasy about boning a cheerleader. What can I say to my normally vanilla girlfriend to convince her to dress up for me?
Make a trade for it! If she does this for you, ask her what you can do in return, even if it is something non-sexual. Fair is fair.

How do I tell my boyfriend he's bad in bed? I think he thinks the clitoris is just like, a spot on my body and not an actual organ you can feel. Where should I start?
Teach him with positive reinforcement. When he does something well, actually say "I like that, do it again." You could also try masturbating in front of each other. That way he can see how you touch yourself and follow your lead.

I got drunk and cheated on my girlfriend of three years. It was a one time thing, and I feel like an asshole. Do I tell her?
If you can keep a secret, don't tell. If you are going to be miserable and guilt-ridden she'll be able to tell something is up. In that case, go into the conversation expecting to get dumped, and just hope for the best.

kat

Kat, 26

www.katstories.tumblr.com

Why are strippers better in bed?
Are they? The closest I've come to having sex with a stripper was dry humping a male dancer once. I would assume that if we are better in bed, it's because our jobs require a certain level of openness. I think it’s safe to say that we’re probably more uninhibited than the average person.

How can I pick up a stripper?
You can remember that we don’t get paid by the hour, so if you try to take up our time at the club without paying us, it’s rude. If you really like a stripper, buy time in the VIP and offer to just let her sit and relax. And don’t try to say that you don’t want to be thought of as a customer. If you’re so worried about that, then don’t go around hitting on people while they’re trying to work.

Is a stripper pole in the bedroom worth the investment? Why or why not?
Investment? Do you mean for exercise, or to spice up your love life? If you’re trying to spice up your love life, I’m not a huge fan of poles in the bedroom. If you think you or your partner would really get off on it though, go for it. Removable stripper poles are not that expensive, and anything that will help your sex life is probably a good investment.

I think my girlfriend and I are breaking up. We've been dating a couple years and are living together. The lease is up in two and a half months. When do I break it off?
I mostly think there’s no time like the present, but I also appreciate that breaking a lease and moving are both expensive and inconvenient. Personally, when I’m ready to break up with someone, I can’t stand waiting, because there’s always something, be it an anniversary, a birthday, or a lease.

I think I might be into pegging. How can I broach this to my girlfriend without freaking her out?
I would broach the subject by slowly initiating some ass play and toys first before you surprise your girlfriend with a harness. After you’ve tested the waters and if she’s been receptive, then just ask her. Make sure you’re tending to her needs in bed too so it feels like a give and take.

What makes a good blowjob?
Being sure the strip-club manager can't see you. Kidding! No teeth. Also, paying attention to how he’s breathing, steady rhythm, and deep throating — if it doesn’t make you gag.

I got drunk and cheated on my girlfriend of three years. It was a one time thing, and I feel like an asshole. Do I tell her?
No. I really don’t believe confessing is the right thing to do if you can honestly say that it will never happen again. I don’t think it does your girlfriend any favors. You fucked up, and you don’t get to unload that on her. As an aside, I think you should get tested.

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