Taner, 38

What do you do for a living?
I was a teacher. I was teaching English back in Turkey. I just moved here.

How long have you been in the U.S.?
I've in the U.S. on and off for one year. I'm here because of my partner. I was here to get my international certificate. In the last week, I met my partner. We fell in love. I came back here. Then he went to Turkey. Then I came back here. And it was too difficult so we ended up here.

Is he Turkish?
No, he's American.

What did he do to impress you when you first met him?
He's a very natural, very calm, very grounded, cute guy. And he keeps taking me to Broadway shows, which I love.

When you first met, who pursued whom?
Well, I'm from a Mediterranean part of Turkey, and a bit dominant. I was chasing him first. Now I'm making him chase me.

What's the difference between dating in Turkey and dating here?
There's something international I think for gays. It's mostly the same. All gays are very open-minded.

Do you have any crazy ex-boyfriends?
Well, actually, I was the craziest one. I had a good job in Turkey. I was a teacher. A nice house. And I left everything to be with my boyfriend, my life, my family, and ended up here.

That's romantic crazy. Any crazy places you've hooked up?
I was dating a clergyman. We were meeting in a church. I was kind of in love with him for nearly a year but then I found out he was doing the same thing with every single Turkish guy in Istanbul. I got disappointed and left him. He was having fun. He was enjoying Turkish guys. The funny thing is he was always meeting me with this outfit. It was a kind of weird seeing crosses and other religious images because I'm not religious at all. It was really weird but very exciting.

Did he ask you to come to the church or was that your idea?
I think it was his fantasy. It was a good fantasy for me as well but it was his fantasy.

 

Katrina, 30

What do you do for a living?
I work at a talent agency.

Any eligible male talent there?
We have a wide variety of talent, older, younger, but it's not like we look at them and say, "Oh, he's dateable." Yeah, sure, we'll say that some of them are pretty hot, but we're not going to go ahead and cross that boundary. At least I won't.

Are you dating now or single?
I'm single.

Did your last relationship end well or badly?
The last guy I dated I'm not really talking to so much. But the last few — I don't really hold onto grudges, so I'm cool with them. It's not like I'm hanging out with them, but I'm civil. I can be nice.

Do you have any exes who have done crazy stuff?
No, thankfully not, knocking on all sorts of wood. They've got no reason to do something crazy to me. If anything, it's their wrongdoing, you know. I didn't do anything.

So they're usually the ones in the wrong?
Yeah! You know, the people who deserve to get their tires slashed. Sure. Am I going to do it? No! That makes me look bad. I'm not going to stoop to their level. It is what it is.

What do you look for in a guy?
Someone who is honest. I think honesty goes a long way.

Have you had a situation in the past where someone has been dishonest?
Oh, absolutely. I like to have my proof before I do any confronting, because then, you know, it turns into speculation and assuming, and I don't like to be criticized for that. And usually we women have our gut feelings, so I kind of just wait it out. And I collect my information. I observe. And I call them out on the things that they do. I've learned to take each relationship as a lesson. They came into my life for a reason.

Is there any particular lesson you could share?
Well, we can take my male best friend. I've known him for years. He was after me for awhile, and he always expressed interest, but deep down I was like, "No, I don't want to ruin the friendship." And after maybe ten years I finally caved in. But ultimately, by us finally hooking up, it did kind of destroy the friendship we had. We're still friends, but it's not the same.

Has anyone ever done anything that's offended you in the bedroom?
I remember I was sleeping with someone in the morning, and he cut one, because he didn't realize who he was next to. He thought he was home alone and he forgot where he was. And I heard it. And it took him like two seconds to realize, and he kind of jumped and said, "Oh my God, did I just do what I just did?" He was mortified at the moment, but then later on he would tell the story as a big joke.

Do you believe in love at first sight?
I used to, but then I grew up. I believe in lust. You can see someone and say, "Wow, I wouldn't mind taking that to the bedroom." Would I cave to that need? No, because I'm not a casual sex person. Sure, that idea looks good on Sex and the City, but it's just not me.

 

Dexter, 25

What's your occupation?
Video editor.

Do you meet many women as a video editor?
No. Only the ones I work with. If I'm going to meet women, I'd say a park, a bar, a library, or church.

Are you single?
I'm dating.

Are you dating one woman or multiple women?
One woman. It's been almost seven months. We met at a film event.

What did you do to impress her?
I took my shirt off, and she was impressed with that, and it went from there.

Under what circumstances did you take your shirt off?
It was just hot waiting for the 6 train, and I took my shirt off on the platform. Well, I was changing my shirt.

She just got a glimpse, and that was all it took?
Yeah.

Do you have any crazy exes?
From college, I would say one or two. If I ignored her, I had notes in my car. It eventually turned into a tire that was allegedly slashed. Allegedly.

How did you finally end that?
I graduated and left. Changed my phone number.

So she doesn't know where you are now?
She does now. It's been a couple of years.

Is there anything crazy you've ever done to hook up with a girl?
In high school, I liked this girl, but she didn't want anything to do with me. So I introduced myself to her parents, without her knowledge. That was kind of impressive, but it didn't work in the long run.

What did she say when she found out?
She thought it was kind of rude, but gutsy.

What did her parents say?
They liked it. Well, I think they were intimidated by a black person walking in their house, trying to show some love. It was pretty gutsy.

What's the craziest place you've had sex?
Outside of a building at our school. On the steps. It was one of those late, half-drunken nights and we just couldn't get back to the dorm in time.

You couldn't?
Yeah, just couldn't make it. Not enough time.

Did anyone catch you?
No. Someone said they saw us, but I just said I was going to the bathroom, because I was a lot bigger than the girl, so you couldn't really see from that vantage point.

Chivalry is not dead.
No.

Do you believe in love at first sight?
With food: yes. With a girl: no.