Love & Sex

The Kama Sutra Illustrated with ‘Nymphomaniac’ Sex Scenes (NSFW)

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The Kama Sutra Illustrated with 'Nymphomaniac' Sex Scenes (NSFW)

If how we screw is reflective of who we are, then we better learn to do it loud and proud.

Are you having sex that's true to yourself or true to an established “norm” set by a conservative society? This deep question and more awaits those who challenge themselves with Lars von Trier's Nymphomaniac, a two-part exploration of sexuality through the lens of a carnal female seeking acceptance in a world where outsiders are quick to shame. With a no holds barred attitude and an absurdist's wink to camera, von Trier and his well-endowed performers bend over backwards to thrust the film into every facet of the sex-driven conversation. If how we screw is reflective of who we are, then we better learn to do it loud and proud.

If you're unacquainted with the sexual possibilities that occur between two individuals, Nymphomaniac is tailor-made to inspire. As the lead character, Joe, sifts through philosophy and human nature, she gives herself over to passion in every way imaginable. Culling from Nymphomaniac Volume 1 and Volume 2 (the first part is currently in theaters, the second part opens April 4, but both parts currently on VOD), here's a taste of the “Nymphomaniac Kama Sutra” — complete with soon-to-be-classic von Trier dialogue.

The Erratic Cellist

"Love distorts things. Love is something you haven't asked for. The erotic was something I asked for, even demanded from men."

The Horizontal Chair

"You're my first one"

"You don't know how happy that makes me."

The French French Kiss

“Fill all my holes.”

The American Weregirl in London

"When we are, death has not come. When death has come, we are not."

The Bored Visitor

“We put on clothes regularly known as the 'Fuck Me Now' clothes.”

The Analytical Doggystyle

“He shoved his cock inside me and humped me three times. Then he turned me over like a sack of potatoes. Then he humped me five times in the ass.”

The Canyon Dive

“For me, love was just lust with jealousy added. Everything else was total nonsense.” 

The Jungle Cat

“He was like some kind of jaguar. He moved like one, which turned me on to no end."

The Disaffected Cowgirl

"When he died, I had no feelings left … I lubricated."

The Erect Podiatrist

“I was having trouble remembering who was who…”

The Acute Angle

“For every 100 crimes made in the name of love, only one is made in the name of sex."

“That's quite a statement.”

“Well, it all strengthened my wish for a serious education."

The Single File

“I read somewhere that if you keep the load too long, the sperm will die. Or worse, degenerate.”

The Early Bird Special

"The most sacred goal for F was my orgasm."

The Longing Gaze

"Later, I heard later that performing a sandwich requires great sensitivity, since the men apparently can feel each other through the tissue."

The Finger Lickin' Good

"The secret ingredient to sex is love."

The Nested Face Sitter

"I decided, perhaps a bit desperately, that the only thing standing between me and the bag of chocolate sweets was an unequivocal provocation of this man."

The Religious Moment

“I wanted to be picked up, put down again and again. I wanted to be treated like a thing.”

The Safety First

“Most people don't scream until I hit them.”

The Tootsie Roll Pop

“P was very discreet, and a girl of few words.”

The Silent Duck

“One can hardly imagine the quacking duck.”

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