Anti-masturbation pastor masturbates at children's playground
By Ray RahmanMarch 1st, 2011, 3:30 pmComments (18)
Grant Storms, an anti-masturbation pastor and "self-styled 'Christian patriot,'" has gone and done the inevitable: got caught masturbating. But ever the overachiever, he took things a step further — Rev. Storms masturbated at a children's playground in a public park.
As reported by the New Orleans Times-Picayune:
The first woman told deputies she was taking her children to the playground and parked next to the van at about noon. As she was walking around her own vehicle, she noticed the van windows were down and the occupant was "looking at the playground area that contained children playing, with his zipper down...," the report said. The woman noted that he was masturbating and quickly ushered her children out of her car.
She told a second woman, who walked to the van and also spotted the man masturbating, the report said. The second witness told deputies that the driver saw her and tried to conceal the zipper area of his pants with his hand.
The two women flagged down a park employee who notified the Sheriff's Office. The employee detained the man, later identified as Storms, until deputies arrived.
The douchebag tried to claim that he was trying to "urinate using a bottle instead of a restroom," but literally nobody bought it because, come on, guy — do we look like idiots? He was booked with obscenity but released "because of jail crowding."
Commentarium (18 Comments)
At some level he must have wanted to be caught.
No surprises here. (sadly)
i love you
I love you too!
Here's a man who probably based most of his self-identity on what he thought was cleansing him of dirty thoughts. Here's a guy who's got these dark, unsettling sexual dysfunction that he might have always contributed to masturbation, so no wonder he was so against it. You could write a whole book based on this news clip. I love it!
i love this kind of stuff...really.
Yeah. Typical Christian shenanigans. Religion is rife with hypocrisy.
Even I can't come up with a comment for this one.
I think you just did.
Rev; what you resist will persist.
Let he who has a free hand cast the first stone.
Genius!
The policeman who lashes the whore has a hot need to use her for the very offense for which he plies the lash.
Shakespeare by way of Hitchens
Oh, it's bad for normal people to rub one out but it's okay for holier-than-thou perverts? Immorality sure isn't what it should be.
If God hated masturbation, he wouldn't have given us opposable thumbs.
If God hated masturbation, he would have made our arms shorter.
Wow, what a shocker. You can be certain that someone who leads a campaign against some sort of "perversion" is always the first to get nailed for doing it.
Well, only if they're a religious zealot.