Limp Bizkit loses record deal, thousands fail to care

This isn't news so much as cosmic justice, but Interscope Records has finally dropped '90s nu-metal relic Limp Bizkit after its latest album, Gold Cobra, sold only 63,000 copies. Fred Durst, the band's singer — uh, let's make that "frontman" — is hilariously in denial about the death throes of his music career.

"One of the things with Gold Cobra was that it was a record for us to do for ourselves, for the core fans, for some of the people that we know in the industry," Durst said during an interview on the podcast Poolside with Dean Delray, which is the only media outlet currently interested in his... um... thoughts. (Apparently the "people that we know in the industry" did not include executives at the band's record label.) "It wasn't our step forward to make a big pop, smash radio record. We just didn't want to make that record at that time. We have been working for a while now to renavigate where we are going to take Limp Bizkit and finally we have been able to get off our label and become independent."

While it "renavigates" and celebrates its independence from commercial success, Limp Bizkit will focus on touring. "We do very, very good on our touring, and we mainly tour outside the United States," Durst said, because A) nobody ever taught him the difference between "good" and "well,"  and B) nobody in America will pay to see him scream about bitches anymore.

At least Durst still has his forthcoming CBS sitcom Douchebag to fall back on, until it's canceled after one or two episodes.