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5 Dating Tricks That Don’t Work On Men

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Phil Dotree, one of the resident “Guys” at The Frisky, wants you gals to know what you’re doing isn’t working for him. For any guy, really. Just… please

His list of “5 Ways Women Try To Impress Men (And Why They Don’t Work)” is debatable because, well, some people have unusual taste. We knew a guy in college who didn’t date a woman unless she wore pounds of makeup. He may have, uh, had issues, though.

1. Perfume. No man I know minds when a woman smells like nothing—a simple stick of deodorant accomplishes this. Women who slather on the perfume end up smelling like the front counter of Macy’s….

2. Tanning. Tanned skin wasn’t seen as a necessary beauty treatment in American society until the last 20 years or so, with the exception of the taxidermy community. [Ed.: That’s all you need to know.]

3. Name Brands. You shouldn’t wear name brand clothes that cost more than they need to just because you want to impress men. If you’re trying to impress women, this sometimes works, but name brand items don’t do much for any man other than Ralph Lauren. And just to prove that men don’t know anything about brands, I just referenced Ralph Lauren. I have no idea if he makes good clothes. Probably not. But he’s the only designer I could name.

4. Makeup. Makeup doesn’t do a lot for guys. In small doses it’s alright, but if I want to get eyeshadow all over my clothes, I’ll go see the Cure in concert.

5. Cosmetic Surgery. …Everyone claims to hate it; yet, it’s still a thriving industry. [Ed.: We’ve been telling you for years: it’s better to be natural than to have work done and be fake.]

What did he miss?

Via The Frisky. Image.

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