Well after the iPod goes the way of the Betamax — my heart just stopped, typing that — long after music is delivered directly via satellite or microwave into a candy-colored chip in our brains, the booty song will endure. Music is sex, sex is music. As long as there are people to seduce, ignore, stalk and ravage, we will make mixtapes to seduce, ignore, stalk and ravage them to. As long as there are rock stars, there will be rock-star fantasies; as long as friends morph into indie purists at the age of 22, there will be secret languages to learn and guilty pleasures to defend. This issue examines our relationship with music, and our relationships' relationship to music. And because we couldn't resist, we made a few recommendations. — Michael Martin
In This Issue:
PERSONAL ESSAYS
Groupie by Arthur Bradford I was with the band.
5.16
Every Breath You Take by Rachel Shukert The '80s pop soundtrack by which we stalk and are stalked.
5.17
My Fourteen Moments in Metal by Molly McCloy "The Def Leppard dress code was perfect for a twelve-year-old future lesbian." 5.18
The Dirty Dozen by Steve Almond The best sex records you've never heard.
5.16
29 Thoughts on the Apparent Sexiness of the iPod by Adam Boyle I don't know about those $99 iPods you wear around your neck. They sort of make you look like you've escaped from an institution.
5.18
Sex Advice From Music Critics by Seb Matthews Q: Describe a new sexual position you've created.
A: I call it the "Rhythm Nation 2005," inspired by my choreography idols Janet Jackson and Paula Abdul. 5.19
That Obscure Object of Desire by Margaret Wappler Being condescended to by the authors of The Rock Snob's Dictionary.
5.23
Let It Be. . . Naked by Grant Stoddard Say you want a revelation about the Beatles' sex lives? Tony Bramwell has a few.
5.23
Inspiration Point by Andy Duncan A survey of responses to the "what music puts you in the mood?" question on Hooksexup Personals.
5.25
Postcards From Fist City by Kate Sullivan The country lyricists' guide to dating, mating and beating down the piece of trash next door.
5.26
EMPLOYEE PICKS Interviews with our favorite new, newish or criminally underrated artists.
/indie/ Private Dancer by Ada Calhoun A Q&A with the Mountain Goats' John Darnelle, who loves both porn and Andrea Dworkin. 5.16
/rock/ Lust for Life by Grant Stoddard Every Quarterslot song is about female desperation — the good kind. 5.16
/country/ Pale Rider by Lisa Carver Dale Watson's life is a country song, a tragic one about the woman he loved, who died on her way to see him. 5.16
/electronic/ Quiet Riot by Adam Kaufman Four Tet's electro wizardry conjures adventure and romance, not just another geek with a laptop. 5.19
/gay Canadians/ Toronto Calling by Bruce LaBruce Meet the Hidden Cameras, Canada's premier gay socialist sex-worshipping indie symphony. 5.25s
/hip-hop/ In Good Company by Will Doig Legendary DJ Mr. Len aims to change hip-hop with his latest title: CEO. 5.26
/r&b/ Older, Wiser and Way Filthier by Susannah Breslin At sixty-nine, Motown great Andre Williams is singing "Let Me Put It In." 6/02
DISPATCHES
Smut City by Ryan Kennedy It's the dirtiest music in the world, and it's in Baltimore.
5.25
