You know how Jackson Pollock and all those other abstract expressionist painters seem merely to randomly fling paint against a blank canvas and call it art?
Well, that's sort of how I cook. After I've put together an entire meal, the entire kitchen manages to be affected, every surface splattered with olive oil, small piles of salt, tomato pulp, and the empty shells of garlic bulbs.
If this is...um...not what you aspire to...
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