Talking to Strangers: Brooklyn, NY
Hooksexup asks deeply personal questions to people we just met.
By Sarah Rammos
Jay, 36
Does your job ever get you laid?
No, me as a person gets me laid. I think I'm a decent looking guy, I'm successful, I can be very charming when I want to be. Or I can be an asshole. I think sometimes women like guys who are kind of assholes. I think women are drawn to a challenge, and assholes are absolutely a challenge. I mean, don't you want to go home with me?
Where's the craziest place you've ever had sex?
I don't know how many times I've had sex with random women in bathrooms at bars and clubs. This one time I was really fucked up, doing some blow or whatever, and I saw these two really hot chicks standing at the bar. So I just walked over to one and said, "You should come with me to the bathroom. It'll be worth your while." And it worked. I had no idea if it would or not. I was fucked up. Just asked her to follow me. I turned around and had no idea if she was going to actually follow me or not, but when I looked she did and that was it. Never saw her again, obviously.
Have you ever been offended in the bedroom?
A girl tried to put her finger in my butt. It just doesn't work for me. Whether she'd asked first or not, it's just… no. Not my thing. I don't think I've ever done anything that put a girl off like that either. I don't really try to push my limits. I mean, if a girl is going to come home with you and have sex with you, don't try to overstep the boundaries.
Do you have a favorite position?
Good question. Either doggy style or cowboy style. It just looks gorgeous with her ass to the back like that.
What's the biggest age difference you've crossed in bed?
I slept with someone who was almost eighteen years older than me when I was really young. It was interesting. I was a little intimidated. I was young, I was a teenager. I was eighteen, and she was thirty-six. I was working in a hospital in the kitchen. She was a divorcee. I absolutely learned some things from her. I learned to slow down. You know, when you're seventeen or eighteen years old and having sex with a woman, you just tend to get so excited and really into it, and you just act crazy. You just go too fast. Older women just want you to relax and wind down. And I know that now. I'm an older guy. I've been around. I've learned.
NEXT: "Back in Iowa I had really long hair, so that got girls to notice me right off the bat…"
Charter, 27
Where are you from?
Iowa. I've been in New York for a year. Iowa's a tighter-knit group. You can't date anyone that your friend hasn't already dated. Here it's way different. You don't know anybody! In Iowa, you personally know everyone that your girlfriend has been with. That's a big problem. Now, I'm good friends with my ex-girlfriend's ex-boyfriend, but at the time, it was weird. Dating here is totally out of my element. It's different just not knowing people. I'm used to knowing somebody from someplace — we have this friend in common or we can talk about this. Here you just totally start from the beginning and that's it.
Do you have any crazy exes?
Yes, I do. Pretty crazy. Crazy in bed, as well. But I don't think I should say anything else. That's not such a good idea.
Where's the craziest place you've ever had sex?
I was at a Motley Crue concert and fingered my girlfriend in front of thousands of people during "Home Sweet Home." It was very ironic. It was definitely an experience. Everybody could see us doing it and they could totally tell, but we didn't really care. After the concert it was a lot of fun, too. We got worked up.
How do you impress the ladies?
Back in Iowa I had really long hair, so that got girls to notice me right off the bat because I looked like Kurt Cobain. I didn't really have to do anything. I comment on girls' shoes a lot, and that gets the conversation going. If a girl is wearing really pointy shoes, I'll say, "Those look like they hurt," and that gets the conversation going.
Have you ever been offended in the bedroom?
A girl wanted to play with my butthole, and I was not into that. I didn't like it. I let her try, but it didn't do anything for me. It pretty much brought everything to a stop. It was like, all right, I let you do this, I didn't like it, let's just go with what we know, okay?
NEXT: "I'm expecting at any moment for them to be all 'Are these yours?' and hold my underwear out in front of my dad…"
Lola, 32
What do you do?
I'm a nursing student. I think guys are into it, the whole nursing thing. I think they think it's hot, the whole nursing fantasy. I went out with this guy who was a total sex addict — like, literally could probably be clinically diagnosed as a sex addict. He was like, "All I want to do is for you to come straight home from the hospital in your scrubs, and I want to rip off your scrubs and it's just going to be amazing and sexy and hot." I am gross when I leave the hospital. I am disgusting, I have germs all over me, and he was begging me, but no. I did have sex with him, but not in my scrubs. It's hard to have sex in scrubs. MRSA, you know? I was told that you can't have sex in the hospital because you'll get MRSA vagina. That's gross. I'd never have sex in a hospital. I know a couple who met in a hospital and now they're dating, but I don't know anyone who'd had sex in a hospital.
Where's the craziest place you've ever had sex?
This doesn't sound that crazy, but I had sex in a pool but there were other people around. We were having conversations with other people while we were fucking. It was kind of gross, actually. This was with a boyfriend. We'd been together for four years at the time.
What's the biggest age difference you've crossed in bed?
I actually have both ends of the spectrum. When I was twenty-six I slept with a forty-seven-year-old, and when I was thirty I slept with an eighteen-year-old. I met the eighteen-year-old when I was in Aruba. We had sex on the stairs on the beach the third night of my vacation. There were probably security cameras everywhere, but whatever. We finish, and I go to get my bag — which has my underwear in it — and it's gone. Somebody stole my purse while we were having sex. It was really embarrassing, because then I didn't even have a key to get into my hotel room, so I had to go to my parents' room and tell them that my purse was stolen on the beach and I couldn't get into my room. And the worst part was that my dad said that we had to make a police report. I tried to talk him out of it, but he was like, "No, your driver's license is in there. That's a big deal. We have to make a police report." So I cancelled my phone and all that, but the officers in Aruba were asking me what was in your bag. I give them the list, my license, my room key, lip gloss, perfume. They kept asking "What else?" and I tell them maybe a few dollars? I didn't have that much money on me, but they weren't satisfied and kept asking. I'm standing there with my dad, and I'm holding back with everything I have inside of me to just say my panties are in my bag, because I'm expecting at any moment for them to pull the bag out and be all "Are these yours?" and hold my underwear out in front of my dad. At that point I was praying, "Please don't have my bag," but they didn't. They thanked me for my statement and that was it. Thank God.
Where are you from?
I'm from New Jersey, but I lived in Miami for twelve years. It's interesting. When I was in Miami I went through a crazy dry spell. I moved here, and initially I was not into the New York scene, but I would go back to Miami to visit and I was the hottest thing in the entire world. I went to Miami, and I was out one night in Fort Lauderdale and met a guy at a bar. We were making out in the bar and he said, "Come with me for a second," and we walked into the alley and he asked me to give him a blowjob in the alley. I just started laughing. No way was that going to happen. What the fuck, man? But it was great — I am so hot in Florida.