Keith Richards attacks a reporter who once gave him a bad review

There are few things in this world that are universally acknowledged as true: adding cheese improves any food, people like watching other people have sex, and Keith Richards will always be above the law. So it makes sense that his natural response to a journalist who had given him a bad review several years ago was to demand an apology, hit him in the head, and tell him “You’re lucky to get out of here alive.”  

Apparently tired of giving interviews where he sounds like he’s finally transitioned into a stately old man (or at least a mortal human being), Richards broke out this new tactic with Swedish journalist Markus Larsson, who said, “His eyes got black and he was absolutely furious. He stood up and asked if we would put out the lights and settle the disagreement straight away,” ending in the alleged “scuffle,” to use Larsson’s polite term for the incident.  

Larsson’s newspaper, Aftonbladet, later issued a statement calling Richards “out of balance.” You’d think his full-body blood transfusion would have cleared that up a while ago.