Cartoon Network brings "Annoying Orange" to television, induces stress dreams worldwide

Parents of the world, rejoice. Cartoon Network is providing a new and exciting way for your kids to annoy the hell out of you. That's right, they're about to inspire incessant "hey apple" jokes with the launch of an entire show based on the "Annoying Orange" viral series.

The show will feature Orange and his buddies Pear, Apple, Marshmallow, Passion Fruit — along with his "nemesis" Grapefruit (yes, really) — in a half-hour block starting next year. The gang will apparently "travel through time in a magical fruit cart." Now I know what you're thinking: finally, Cartoon Network is giving us the produce-inspired Doctor Who homage we've long yearned for. But sadly, I'm guessing the magical fruit cart is really just a means for the Orange to bug Joan of Arc and Teddy Roosevelt with terrible jokes.

In case you've blissfully managed to avoid this YouTube phenomenon, the Annoying Orange is a series of short videos in which the Orange pesters his friends with puns like, "Hey apple, you look fruity." Naturally, this has earned over 89 million views. And now a half-hour TV show. As in, thirty whole minutes of this:

God help us all.