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Beatdown
by Paul Neilan

"I tried faking an orgasm but she either didn't notice or didn't care. I tried bucking her off but that only made it hurt worse." /fiction/
Rock Around the Bunker
by Viva Sarah Press

Israeli band The Genders lay siege to the American underground. /music/
Scanner
by Gwynne Watkins and Ada Calhoun

Running naked around the internet.
The Screengrab
by Bilge Ebiri

Today on Hooksexup's film blog: The Simpsons Movie.
Horoscopes
by Neal Medlyn

Your week in sex. /regulars/
The Devil's Dictionary
by Mark Peters

Grant Barrett collects sex slang, one dirty word at a time.
Fringe Festival
by Various

Inspired by the work of Diane Arbus. /photography/
Getting Warmer
by David Agasi

The art of seduction. /photography/
Sex Advice from . . . Astrologers
by Laura Barcella

Q: Where can I meet hot astrologers?
A: Yoga classes or metaphysical bookstores. Stay away from the ones who hang out in ashrams. /regulars/
Pirate Daddy's Lonely Hearts Club Call-In Show
by Jardine Libaire

Transcripts from a Google-FBI Inc. investigation. *future issue*
The Eleventh
by Amanda Boyden

After celebrity worship becomes the fastest-growing religion. *future issue*
Live From the COPA Trial
by Rufus Griscom, et. al.

Blogging the Child Online Protection Act hearing in Philadelphia. *politics issue*
The Single Girl's Guide to Compromising Homeland Security
by Jen Kirkman

When dating is government-regulated, this unmarried woman is a security threat. *future issue*
Miss Information
by Erin Bradley

This week: Miss Information's greatest hits, plus two Japan-only bonus tracks. /advice/





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Os an American, I expect television comedies — even the "smart" ones — to have a light, fluffy consistency, to go down without much chewing. So I must admit that Slings & Arrows, wonderful as it is, threw me at first. The hit Canadian show has more in common with a good college class than a bad sitcom. Its first season is unapologetically dense: dozens of characters pack witty jokes, dramatic plot twists, honest

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sex scenes and whole Shakespearean monologues into every hour-long episode. And yet it's compulsively watchable. Call it a not-guilty pleasure.
   The show's anti-hero is Geoffrey Tenant, played by slyly charismatic actor Paul Gross. (Devotees of overlooked Canadian TV shows may remember Gross from Due South.) Geoffrey was once a lead actor at the famed New Burbage Shakespeare Festival, where he worked under the direction of his best friend, Oliver (Stephen Ouimette), and starred alongside his girlfriend, Ellen (Martha Burns). That all changed when Jeffrey went mad — literally — during one infamous performance of Hamlet. Now, at the start of Slings and Arrows, he is an outcast from the theatrical establishment, while Ellen and Oliver have become jaded, dissatisfied veterans Ellen is a full-blown diva who collects teenage lovers; Oliver is a sellout artistic director who drunkenly reminisces about his collaborations with Geoffrey.
   Then Oliver gets hit by a truck, and in a strange turn of events, Geoffrey is hired to take his place. The company is shocked; won't the presence of a half-insane man wreak havoc on the Festival? Will Jeffrey's bitter ex-lover Ellen be able to work alongside him? And with Oliver gone, who will save their disastrous upcoming production of Hamlet?
   The answer to these questions is entirely obvious — after all, Shakespeare's audiences always knew where the story was going — and it's a pleasure to sit back and watch the acts unfold. The writers have a fantastic time juggling theatrical clichés (the leading lady who breaks her leg and makes the understudy a star) with Shakespearean archetypes (the yuppie Lady Macbeth who plots to overtake the festival with corporate sponsors). Parallels between Geoffrey and Hamlet are freely
Even sex symbol Rachel McAdams comes across as a genuine girl-next-door, albeit one you'd really, really like to share a neighborhood with.
drawn; aside from his mental instability and tendency to start duels, he has frequent visitations from Oliver's ghost, who urges him onto greater and more devious ambitions.
   Even if you have no particular love for Hamlet, you're likely to feel a kinship with the residents of the New Burbage Festival. They struggle daily to find self-expression in an increasingly corporate world. Because they do what they love for a living, their lives lack clear boundaries of work and play — it's all tackled with the same dramatic enthusiasm.
   Which brings us to those sex scenes. They're not explicit, but they're as vital to the show as Shakespeare. As Geoffrey says to a colleague: "There is one thing about acting that I miss. I was in love with an actress, a beautiful, talented actress, and when we were together on the stage, it was like having sex in public . . . People would stand and cheer and they would throw flowers, and then we would go home and make love. I miss that. Because life cannot compete with that." Geoffrey and Ellen have personalities too big for everyday lives, or jobs, to contain; Shakespeare and fucking are their only outlets.
   It should be noted that the cast of Slings & Arrows boasts very few actors with typical Hollywood looks. The leading lady is unabashedly middle-aged, and not in that Desperate Housewives, forty-is-the-new-twenty kind of way. Instead, Ellen is an archetype that doesn't really exist on American television, a proud older woman who seduces younger men without wealth or miniskirts, only confidence and charisma. Likewise, Geoffrey is weary-looking, unshaven and paunchy; he's more of a sexy English professor than a matinee idol. The lack of facelifts and six-packs makes all the characters seem accessible, real, and infinitely more appealing. Even sex symbol Rachel McAdams comes across as a genuine girl-next-door, albeit one you'd really, really like to share a neighborhood with.
   And at the end of the series, it's McAdams, the company's starry-eyed ingénue, who best sums it up. Emerging from the stage on opening night, she grabs Geoffrey and asks him, "Could there be there anything better than this?" But before he can answer, her co-star sweeps her into a kiss, carries her off into his dressing room and shuts the door.  







ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Gwynne Watkins is a member of the Hooksexup editorial staff and an as-yet-unknown playwright. Her last three workshopped plays were about The Bible, Britney Spears and Wonderwoman, respectively.


©2006 Gwynne Watkins and hooksexup.com.

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