Five Reasons to Hope for a U.S. Default

Even the impending debt apocalypse has its upsides.
By Jonathan Weed
So, it’s come to this: after weeks of work, congressional Democrats and Republicans have failed to reach a debt-ceiling compromise. The event that Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner called “unthinkable” last week — a U.S. default on its debt obligations — has started to look pretty thinkable. In other news, the House spent Thursday afternoon renaming post offices. (Sources close to Speaker John Boehner explained that the Titanic deck chairs were not available on short notice.)
Sound bleak? Buck up; here are five reasons why a U.S. default might not be the worst thing in the whole world. They’re not entirely serious, but, hey, neither is Congress.
1. Say hello to the Workers’ Paradise.
Marxists know that there’s only one way to build a communist world: we need a proletarian revolution to overthrow capitalism and usher in the start of the socialist era. (If this idea makes you uncomfortable, it’s probably because you own the means of production.) A U.S. default and the economic shockwaves it produces could be just the jolt that the working class needs to finally start that revolution it’s always talking about. To arms, my brothers!
2. It’s better than the alternative, according to some Austrians.
Ron Paul, the chief gnome (excuse me, angry Ron Paul supporters: Dr. Gnome) of the Austrian school of economic theory, wrote an editorial last week explaining how a debt default now is better than a larger disaster later. Raising the debt ceiling now, he claims, would mean continuing monetary looseness, uncontrollable inflation, and an even bigger bust in the future. Dead Austrian Eugen Ritter von Böhm-Bawerk agrees. (Most other economists don’t.)
3. We’ll get to see John Boehner’s biggest cry yet.
If you thought Boehner’s tearful meeting with Republican lawmakers on Wednesday was exciting, just wait for the waterworks that would accompany a default. Boehner’s marketed himself and his Republican House to the American people on the strength of his folksy charm, and if there’s one thing folks do when the government fails to fulfill its basic economic obligations, it’s cry. And cry. And invoke small-business owners. And cry some more.
4. Members of Congress will finally get back to the important work of doing nothing.
Time was when a big day for a member of Congress meant showing up for roll call and maybe getting a few thousand dollars for your district’s maritime mammal museum. But this debt-ceiling fight has meant that politicians have had to work for literally hours at a time. For a body which meets barely 150 days a year and whose most powerful strategic move, the filibuster, is based on making sure that nothing happens, this is unacceptable. I appreciate President Obama’s insistence that members of Congress meet on the weekends to solve the crisis, but I think we all know that the men and women of Washington simply aren’t cut out for this kind of pressure.
5. My personal financial troubles look tame by comparison.
Remember the semester in 11th grade when you got a C- in Biology but your parents didn’t get mad at you because your sister brought home a D in Conduct? A debt default is like that, for the whole nation. If the United States fails to make a payment on its “national credit card,” as Obama is fond of calling it, can Capital One really complain when I fail to make a payment on mine? Poll numbers are already showing that neither Obama nor Congressional Republicans look good in this fight, and if the government defaults they won’t be able to hold a candle to me — a responsible, reasonable, non-global-economic-catastrophe-causing American. It’s been said that citizens of a democracy get the government they deserve. Maybe this embarrassing fiasco will finally convince us that we deserve better.
Commentarium (35 Comments)
What a bunch of assholes.
Fuckin' thank you.
John Boehner is an opportunistic piece of shit. The whole thing is a dog and pony show for the Republican party. I only wish that Boehner had the balls to follow through with it.
He really is. I mean sponsoring and getting two bills through the House and sending them to the Senate to be killed? What an asshole. We'd be much better off if the GOP did nothing like Reid and Obama.
Well, would it kill him and the rest of his rank and file to budge an inch so we could get a goddamn compromise already? The deal Boehner and Obama almost made seemed so perfect, why can't the stupid parties stop being so stubborn? And while Obama hasn't been a saint, at least he's not a backstabber like Boehner who's been talking shit everywhere.
Why is it up to Republicans to compromise? Why can't the Democrats?
Obama isn't a saint, no, but he is a backstabber - he and Boehner agreed to $800B in revenue increases and then Obama increased it to $1.2T.
A lot of this didn't make a whole lot of sense.
Yeah. It really doesn't. Also, fuck everyone who voted for these fucking small children who are bankrupting our country. They're completely irresponible.
You're talking about Obama I hope. The GOP wants fiscal responsibility while the Dems want to try and spendour way out of this. It won't happen
Hahaha, I clicked on this and the add at the top reads:
Send a message, stand with Boehner:
No blank checks for Obama's agenda.
It includes a picture of Speaker Boner looking quite orange.
It doesn't make a lot of sense, it isn't particularly interesting, and I don't understand why it's here, frankly. Is there anyone that comes to Hooksexup to read about politics? Not even sex-related issues in politics?
Wth, I posted a negative comment similar to this and it was deleted. I hope your isn't next to be snubbed.
Whoa, I didn't know they delete comments on here! First right, dudes, c'mon. I just jumped straight down here to the comments to vent anyway, one look at the headline and I knew it would be a ridiculous waste of time.
I liek reading about politics on Hooksexup, esp. when they make fun of douches like boehner
This is a good piece and made perfect sense. Unexpected to see it on Hooksexup, but welcome nonetheless.
Your limited grasp of politics is what doesn't make sense. You should go back to Jezebel and let the grown-ups talk...
I think, the can do nothing house needs to pass a law to change Boehner's last name to Boner.
I just received this tweet, passing it along. "The American Voter's Pledge: I will never miss another election. I will never vote Republican again."
Excellent. Vote Conservative - the only way to save the Nation.
Here in Europe we just see the situation and think, "wow, Republicans are really irresponsible". I mean, from outside it looks like they're pushing for a default just to prove their point, and that is pretty irresponsible.
thrilled that short sighted and small minded rules in Europe and not here
Actually Mirror it's reassuring to see that you see it exactly how it is. This reply from Joe is just an example how Republicans think, never about what is best for the country as a whole, just about how they can gain political power and protect their personal interests.
Yes Fred- nothing says country first like Obama/Pelosi Reid right? Self serving political hacks
Come on, Joe. Just because Obama, Pelosi and Reid have increased the debt by 40% already doesn't mean they don't have a plan. They just won't tell us what it is.
Please forgive us if we won't take financial advice from Europe. You're further down the drain than we are.
wait, which side is winning? isn't this a game? YOU are not winning at this game... I am not winning either... we are apparently on opposite sides (not you mirror, but these other american dbags here whose first instinct is to defend their stand, and then defend their country, as if any of it matters. Americans view everything like a competition, it's from all that reality tv they glutton themselves with. they are a disgusting stupid race of people, evolving and honing the grossest of human natures, embracing selfishness and greed and they still feel like they are the winning Q-back in a football game no matter how wrong and awful they are. BUT they do go to church, yes they do, and jesus tells them they are good people if they go to church and give the church money... so they do, and then they get to be awful shits the rest of the week. And they are. i know. i live here, among so many alligators on the left and the right who fail to see the forest for all those damn fucking wedge issue trees, the abortion tree, the debt ceiling tree (stupids here do not even understand what it means), nobody gets how our economy runs on corporate agenda, not GOP or Dem (well, okay, GOP agenda = corp agenda). People are no longer part of the US govt, it's all corporations running lobbyists to pay congress to enact laws that benefit corporations and the wealthy. That is not any of you people here. Unless, Joe? Reporter guy? you both wealthy millionaires yet? Should we start calling you Thurston and Lovey? Good luck to our country, we are led by egomaniacs who have forgotten how to simply say "hey, let's look at this and try to compromise like adults do everyday in marriage and life." Instead we have keystone cops running our govt. Both sides suck. Understand that and that's half our battle.
Wow... mix a little LSD in your coffee Anaszasi?
INSERTMICHAELCAINEFACEHERE
It is really pathetic that Obama did not address this issue in either 2009 0r 2010 when it should have been addressed and was not a crisis. He had a rubber stamp Congress in Pelosi and Reid but taking action would have required courage and leadership skills- both of which he lacks. Now his own party has removed him from the dialogue- very sad
Obama is a great motivator and a terrible leader. All talk, no action. He could get people to lick lead paint just by telling people it would get them laid, but he couldn't do it first, even if it was good for the body. It's the same way with everything he's done so far. Everything has been a major disappointment after his sweeping victory in 2008.
despite how we all hoped he would succeed, it seem clear that his lack of experience is coming back to haunt him and our party. Hillary 2012
Hillary ain't running... unless she starts her own American Party. Fuck both the Demoncrats and the Repulsicans.
I like how you describe Paul as a gnome when he predicted this housing bubble and the rest of the bullshit a decade ago.
Keep those blinders on tight Hooksexup! That way you can beg for a government big enough to satisfy your social agenda while still acting surprised and sobbing every time it gets involved in your sex life.
Why does Hooksexup cover this stuff? Answers: Boehner and Weiner. I thought it was obvious.
Sure is funny how every major Democrat who is currently looking to raise the debt ceiling voted against doing so last time this came up (under W)... so while you're all calling Boehner opportunistic you might want to look to the other side of the aisle to see the EXACT SAME OPPORTUNISTIC BEHAVIOR just a few short years ago.
Politicians only do what is politically advantageous to themselves. Nothing more, nothing less, and both sides are EQUALLY guilty.
Ah, i see. Well that's not too tcrkiy at all!"
Since we have a "national credit card," when we cannot pay the debt, is Red China going to put a lien on the USA, like B of A would on your home?