Even if you could have imagined the private life of daytime TV's most ridiculed host, I doubt you could have come up with this. Rosie O'Donnell and her young children once killed hammerhead sharks for pleasure and fun.
On Tuesday, The Rosie Show featured a mocking public service announcement and an angry man in a fuzzy shark costume in what I guess amounts to an apology over her family's cherished, bloody pastime. The O'Donnells have enjoyed the occasional shark haul on more than one occasion, a fact that fishing guide Mark 'The Shark' Quartiano brought to light after he named O'Donnell "this month's celebrity angler" on his website, but they'll have to find a new hobby now that hammerhead sharks have been declared an endangered species as of January 1st.
Technically they didn't do anything wrong. Hammerheads weren't endangered when the O'Donnells went on their sea raids, and they only killed "3 or 4 HUGE sharks not far off the shore." Basically, as Rosie tweeted, "@peta @therosieshow – it was years ago asswipe – b4 they were on the endangered list." For some reason, environmentalists saw the issue a little differently.
So how do you apologize for contributing to the endangerment of a species majestic enough to garner an entire week of television on the Discovery Channel when you're not at all sorry about it? Start off with a fake PSA that isn't an apology and manages to include an oh-so-trendy-dig at Donald Trump. Insist that 'I'm actually a friend of all animals.'" Finally, remind audience members that "hammerhead sharks are endangered," so now it's time for everyone to "treat them well" and find some other ridiculous trophy animal to kill out of boredom.