Ladies, are you having trouble getting your partner to linger downtown? Have you always thought, “If only my delicate lady-parts tasted and smelled more like, I don’t know…peppermint…all would be well?”
Well, your prayers have been answered via our consumer culture! As a new product called Linger is eager to point out, “72% of women will admit they are somewhat self conscious about either their scent or flavor.” Naturally, the answer to this is to buy a breath-mint for your vagina dentata.
“Linger Internal Feminine Flavoring was created to flavor the woman in such a manner that is safe and effective, decreases self consciousness, and increases excitement. It improves the length and quality of oral sex between a woman and her intimate partner.
A small, naturally sweetened flavoring, free of artificial dyes, which was created to flavor the secretions of a woman when she is sexually aroused. Linger is shaped for comfort during insertion and use, and is formulated to dissolve slowly, so the effects last and last…”
Linger’s site is chock-full of testimonials, from:
“I’m really self conscious and just couldn’t relax enough to enjoy my fiancé going down on me. Once I tried Linger it was easy-such a sexy feeling. He loves the flavor, I love the results!” (Sarah G, Business Manager, New York, NY)
To:
“Hey, we tried it, it took a little while to work, so make sure that you put it in long enough in advance, but once it started working, it was GREAT! It also caused a warm tingling…” (Kelly L, Department Manager, St Louis, MO).
We polled a few ladies, and their first response was: “Um, yeast infections, much?” And isn’t it more important to address the fact that women would be ashamed of their own bodies and scents? Do you really need to taste like candy to “fool” guys to go down on you?
So, let us know: would you put an artificial flavor in your lady parts, and why?
Via YourTango.