Talking To Strangers: Zombie Edition

We chat up the undead at Atlanta, GA's Zombie Pub Crawl.

By Gilly South

Clifton, 32

What brings you to the Zombie Pub Crawl?

I'm an attorney and some of my clients put this on. It's a great way to come out and have a great time and meet new people. And I've been a costumer for about three years. This costume is Ash from Army of Darkness.

Are you single?

No, actually, I have a girlfriend.

Is she into the zombie thing?

Not really. She's more into anime and the clean, pretty side of costuming, whereas I like the dirty, messy side.

What are your turn-ons?

Intelligence is a huge thing. Openness, authenticity. As far as physically, I like pretty faces. A body is nice, but kissing is a big deal, and I like to look at what I'm kissing, so I go for a pretty face.

Turn-offs?

Closed-mindedness. I grew up in Alabama, so it was very common for people to dismiss evolution and science as pure bunk. That's a turn-off. The shortest date I ever had was with a girl who said that fossils were put in the earth by the Devil to trick us. I had to bounce. It's the only time I've ever walked out of a date.

What do you love about your girlfriend?

She's very high-energy and open-minded. My job can make me very focused and very low-energy. She's always so open and high-energy that she brings me up. No matter what my mood is, she's happy, she's exciting. I know that when I see her, it's almost Pavlovian — I'm going to smile. That's a huge deal. Looks are important when you start dating someone, but I've dated girls who were very cute, but after two dates — nothing.

Do you believe in "the one?"

I don't at all. I've dated quite a few girls who were amazing for so many different reasons. No one is perfect, and you can meet someone who has so many things you love, but if you break up, you can meet someone who is completely different and you can be just as amazed and inspired and turned-on. I always say, don't think of someone as "the one," think, "Is this working for me?" I think the whole concept of "the one" is why we have such a high divorce rate. I've seen a lot of people say, "I thought she was 'the one,' so I thought I had to put up with everything." Life has a lot of big questions, like kids, marriage, where you want to live, what sorts of things you want to teach your kids. If you don't find someone who meets your needs, I think you need to not settle. There are amazing people out there.

 

Allison, 22

What do you do?

I work in a study room at a university.

Are you in a relationship now?

No.

What kinds of guys are you attracted to?

Mostly friends of friends, people I know I have something in common with. They have to be into zombies. That's a big deal for me. And horror movies. They have to have a sense of humor. And they've got to be taller than me. I'm kind of tall — I'm 5'7" — and I feel like a bitch for saying that, but it's true. I typically go for tall, dark, and handsome.

What are your turn-offs?

Fratty guys. Polos: not hot.

Do have any crazy relationship stories?

I dated a guy who moved to the other side of the world, to Asia, and didn't tell me until a month beforehand. I actually put up with the long-distance thing for about a year and a half.

Did you do a lot of sexy Skyping?

A little, not a lot. Unless you're both really sexually frustrated, it's going to be awkward.

What's the craziest thing a guy has done to try to pick you up?

One time a guy at a party gave me a chainsaw and was like, "Here, you can play with this." It was actually really hot. I had it for most of the evening, but I gave it back at the end of the night.

Sounds like a phallic thing.

Yeah, a phallic, power thing. It was not an actual, working chainsaw, I should say. But I could lift it up and threaten people with it, in a fun way.

Have you ever made out with someone with a full face of zombie make-up on?

Sure. The blood takes like spearmint or candy, so that's good. The makeup tastes kind of gross.

 

Joshua, 21

What do you do?

I'm in the U.S. Army. National Guard.

Are you in a relationship now?

Yes, I am. Kind of.

"Kind of?" What does "kind of" mean?

"Kind of" means she has a fiancé. It's terrible, I know.

Is she also in the army?

She was. She had an asthma attack and got medically discharged.

If she has a fiancé, what are you doing waiting around for her?

Just bein' stupid.

You're in love with her?

I wouldn't say in love, but infatuated. She's awesome, attractive, beautiful, she has a fun personality, she's fun to be with. It means a lot to me that we hang out.

What are your turn-ons? Obviously not availability.

No, I like the taken chicks. I can't lie about that.

Really? This is a habit for you?

Occasionally. Once or twice. I just like girls who are really pretty. Redheads. Kinky chicks. Biting, punching, sadomasochism. I'll try anything once, minus homosexuality.

You're covered in fake blood now, but is there ever actual blood involved?

Well, I have a scar on my arm from biting, but that's as far as it's ever gone.

What's the kinkiest thing you've ever done?

A girl tied me down to my bed with Nintendo controllers and then did whatever she wanted.

Do you like women in the army?

Yeah, I like girls with the same profession as me. But there's two types of army chicks — the really butch ones and the really attractive ones. Most girls, when they go into basic training, they grow a pair of balls. But occasionally you get that amazing girl, like the one I like, whom you can talk to about what you do at work and she understands. That's what I enjoy.

Would you like to see yourself in a committed relationship?

Absolutely.

Then are you still holding out for this chick with the fiancé?

Well, yes and no. I've kind of come to realize that it's probably not going to work out and she's going to end up with the fiancé. We haven't done too much to ruin their relationship.

So you haven't had sex with her?

No. But it's to the point where... I don't know.

You just can't forget about her.

Exactly. And she comes down and sees me every now and then, and it's really amazing. I don't want to give it up yet.

 

Jessica, 25

What do you do?

I'm a hairstylist.

Does that ever get you laid?

No, never. Sometimes guys hit on me, but it doesn't go further than that.

Are you in a relationship?

Yeah, he's a metal guy in a band. It's going really well. We don't agree on a lot of things, though. He's more political than I am. I'm pretty lax. He's really argumentative and tries to change people. I deal with it because at the end of the day he doesn't try to change me. But he hasn't realized he's never going to change other people's minds by fighting with them.

How'd you guys hook up?

We were extras on the shoot for the film Halloween 2 in Newburn, GA. We'd actually been dating for a couple weeks, and after spending fourteen-hour days together and not wanting to kill each other, it got serious. It was a good test to see if we could make it.

What's the craziest thing you've done for love?

Nothing. I'm lazy.

What are your turn-ons?

Musicians and facial hair — mutton chops, beards. Pompadours, although my boyfriend is bald. Confidence, being a man, not being a pussy.

What are your turn-offs?

Dudes who are overweight or have too much body hair. No super-conservatives; I'm definitely a liberal girl. Bros. Guys who live off of their parents. Polo shirts with a popped collar.