We won't bore you with stories of our orgy and menage a trois experiences... because that's not why you're going to click on this post, right?
Without ado, the Five Best Sex Scenes That We Were Able To Find On The Internet And Could Embed Here... Part One. Suggestions, as always, for the next wave, in the comments section...
5. Rampage: The Hillside Strangler Murders. With a whopping 3.9-out-of-ten ranking on IMDB, you would be forgiven for not having heard of this via word-of-mouth. But now that Brittany Snow has been chosen to star in the Gossip Girl spinoff, expect this awful/true story to be repackaged in a useless Director's Cut DVD, complete with this sex scene stretched four milliseconds longer.
4. Factotum. If Marisa Tomei weren't in this scene, it wouldn't even have occurred to us to include it. After all, unless you consider dual finger-bangs "sex," this isn't much of a sex scene. But... again... Marisa Tomei, people...
3. Threesome. For a movie with sexual innuendo in the title, there isn't enough actual sex here. However, this clip does feature Lara Flynn Boyle getting talked "dirty" to over the phone while Stephen Baldwin goes down on her in person-- that counts, right? Oh, and there's an almost hot scene starting about 3:30 in with actual one-on-one sex. (The phone stuff starts at about 5:30.)
2. Wild Things. Jesus H! Is Matt Dillon in every great threesome in Hollywood history? You think he writes them in after signing his contract or will he not even agree to a role unless there's some menage goin' on? For us, the movie never gets finer than the opening scene, where a soap-sudsy Denise Richards stands dripping in Dillon's doorway, but everyone seems to think this is hotter 'n hell, so here goes...
1. American Psycho. "In terms of lyrics craftsmanship... this album hits new peaks of professionalism. Sabrina, why don't you dance a little?" In another director's hands, this would've been too unsettling to be darkly humorous. Is the film over-the-top, obvious, excessively violent and ultimately not the greatest movie? Absolutely. Is this sex scene near-genius? You put that in granite and stamp it on a business card.
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