The apartments directly across from mine have the most deliciously large windows. <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

For years I've been peering over the crawling ravine that is the busy street below, hoping to catch some action happening on the other side. Remarkably in all the years I've lived there, I haven't come across much of anything in the way of interest.

Once, I heard a tremendous explosion go off, and I immediately rushed to my window to investigate. It turns out an air conditioner had blown up in one of the units over there. In all the chaos, I saw some discombobulated middle aged man running around naked, his pitiful looking shlong bobbing up and down like a floppy sardine doing the happy dance. I was infuriated. All these years wasting my time spying on these assholes, and all I get is some guy's penis in my face?

I dunno, I guess I've always enjoyed observing other people. I think it stems from my childhood, as my parents would constantly be commenting on strangers, usually in a decidedly negative albeit hilarious manner. I guess for them mocking others was a way of venting frustrations they had going on in their own lives. Ironically, if someone was so inclined, our family would have been sublime mocking fodder. My foreigner father, and his irritable wife towing two enormous googly eyed twins around. It must've been a sight