LILFs: Links I'd Like to...

What a week it's been.

by Hooksexup

First of all, thanks for bearing with us as we get up to speed in the wake of Sandy's smackdown of our headquarters and homes. We hope all of you and your loved ones made it through okay, and we hope Sandy gets something embarrassing and incurable. She was the worst.

If They're Voting for Romney, Don't Have Sex With Them

Via Thought Catalog, a simple rule of thumb for election day. "When you’re having sex with a Romney voter, it’s not just so wrong it’s right. It’s so wrong it wants to take away your civil liberties and replace them with corporate tax breaks, Wal-Marts and Chick-fil-A sandwiches for everyone." So have sex for America. Don't have sex with someone who's voting for Mitt Romney.

I Dreamed of Being a Plus-Sized J.C. Penney Catalog Model

Via The Hairpin, here's Shanna Green's account of growing up with one clear, plus-sized aspiration. Of course, her family's not as supportive as she'd hoped: on telling her mother about her dream, she writes, "Until that point in my life, the only time I'd ever seen my mother laugh that hard was at a John Candy movie."

Nation Suddenly Realizes This Just Going To Be A Thing That Happens From Now On

Via The Onion. If we don't start addressing climate change in a meaningful way, the weather is just going to continue making concerted efforts to knock us off its turf. So, get used to that reality, and when we start getting dumped on by snow this winter, do not make the same joke you always make about "So this is global warming?" Mother Nature hates that shit. 

8 Rules for the Third Wheel in a Three-Way

Thankfully, Em & Lo have this covered. And no, one of them is not "Find a fourth!"

How Hurricane Sandy Slapped the Sarcasm Out of Twitter

The New York Times details how Twitter matured shockingly fast in the light of Sandy's assault on New York. It's back to snark, now, though. But for a brief period, we were shown exactly how useful the site can be when everyone decides to stop trolling and help.