State Department employee runs sex contest with Princeton buddies
By Ray RahmanJanuary 4th, 2011, 2:03 pmComments (19)
Would you like to see a State Department Staffer and his fellow Princeton alums partake in a bizarre, internationally disgusting sex game?
Well, too bad: Robert Huber, a Foreign Service Officer at the U.S. Embassy in London (douche in center), joined his ol' college pals Adam Wible (douche on left) and Ian McHenry (the third douche) in a competition to see who could "get" and/or "dog" as many girls in the world as possible. ("Get" and "dog" are, of course, the sexy new verbs that all the hippest douchebags are using these days.)
The contest resulted in a lot of emails between the braggadocious bros, emails that tally up their conquests, which include women with "chernobyl'd faces," ladies who "come faster than a thirteen-year-old boy," "classy Japs," and so many more variously offensive phrases.
Here are a few emails, courtesy of Jezebel:
Fijian, not hot, but it's a Tuesday - what are you going to do? Made her come for only the second time in her life, using Rob's dirty dog down under trick. Almost vommed the next morning thinking about getting her.
Singaporean diplomat, tight Asian body, mediocre face. told her it was my birthday, got a birthday kiss, went back to her place, got to get her tiny little pussy, then rushed home first thing this morning to start washing my sheets/towels pending the arrival of...
I got her with an extra-thick cizzle to avoid any infections that she might have received from Ian. She comes faster than a 13 year old boy.
Some kind of reggaeton/ballet dancer, on her way to train people in Brazil. Flattish, tight tight ass, great attitude. Agreed to go on the boat, spontaneously, at 2am, at which point she clearly waived all right of refusal. Was an experienced sailor and a great girl, but Ian and I drank so much rum that we spent the following day sailing them around, trying not to vom, and counting down the minutes. Weathered and unshaved.
Unfortunately, that's just the start. Jezebel's got the rest of the scandalous emails, as well as more information on the guys involved. Spoiler alert: Adam and Ian have a delightful little blog dedicated to their worldly yachting excursions.
Commentarium (19 Comments)
The species is doomed. You sure these aren't wall street douchebags? Good to know the affliction crosses career thresholds.
Put them on the carrier with that other fool.
I really don't like this article. I mean, is anyone suggesting that these people are doing anything illegal? Are they guilty of anything other than being complete dickheads? Is that no longer allowed in the state department? Is Hooksexup now going to publish uninteresting expose after dull feature on complete douchebags complete with names and pictures? It's like Perez Hilton, except without celebrities.
I really think that this article is disgusting. Jezebel should never have posted it (although, lets not forget the daily show thing last year), but Hooksexup should certainly never have repeated it. What idiots do in their own free time is entirely up to them.
How amazing would it be if we could all just ignore the things that happen in other peoples’ sex lives? Think how much we'd get accomplished.
Wait, I think I've heard that somewhere before....
Did Karen Owen of the famed Sexual Conquest Thesis at Duke get called names by Hooksexup? That's right it's okay for females to tap a few and make it public but not for males to do the same. How enlightened.
Vom? Is that really a thing? Anyone?
What's nice about this is that with the internet, this will follow these three douchebags around for the rest of their lives. I wonder how far douche no. 1 will go in his foreign service career now? I'd pay money to be a fly on the wall when an HR vice presidents googles one of these guys applying for a job.
Also, wasn't "The Third Douche" an Orson Wells film?
That sounds like one of the worst things about the Internet, profrobert. No matter how distasteful we judge their sexual habits, these three men didn't do anything illegal. Their personal and professional lives shouldn't be ruined over this.
Everyone on Hooksexup is all for staying out of people's bedrooms when gay marriage is involved, and the same should apply to three bros having a perfectly legal international sex contest.
Vom = vomit.
Clicked thinking they were fucking each other. Left disappointed.
Vom? please don't say that
If the "getees" and "dogees" were all consenting adults, that's one thing. If these "boys" are crossing a line, that's another.
I live abroad, and I've met a lot of guys like this. I didn't know it was significant enough to write an article about. And I didn't expect Hooksexup to be the one to try wielding the shame stick against sexual practices that they didn't like.
Just because it's legal doesn't make them not douchebags. Moreover, it's one thing to engage in various sexcapades (whether in a douchebaggy manner or not). It's another to brag about it on the internet. Do you really want these assclowns in your organization? They show no judgment or common sense (this is akin to putting photos of yourself smoking a bong on the top of your public Facebook page), and lots of disrespect for women. Why would any sane HR chief take a risk that they are going to create a hostile work environment and get my company sued?
You're right, profrobert. I messed up. I was under the impression that these were just emails that had somehow leaked to Jezebel, but they had a blog, so these guys dug their own grave.
I find this more than a little frightening, if even in jest: "Agreed to go on the boat, spontaneously, at 2am, at which point she clearly waived all right of refusal."
to hmmm: What about a shame stick at the disgusting racism of the emails?
So...the student doing a thesis on how good of lays guys were is OK, but a joke among friends isn't?
This is stupid. I don't see anything wrong with this. If they did post it, kind of stupid, but if its just leaked emails than there's nothing wrong. Lots of guys compete with each other, and sleeping with lots of women is on the up and up no matter what anyone thinks about it. The fact that they objectify women and have some racial wording is fine. I don't get people getting pissed off about that. Did you never go to college? Every single group of people I know talks somewhat like that. You can use racial epithets in your own private groups of friends without actually being racist. I've said nigger before, but I don't hate black people.
Some people just need a life. Also, anything that comes from Jezebel is trash. Please don't link anything back to them. Jezebel has done more to set back male/female relations in the past week than these guys will do in their whole life.
Now you say something