Maybe you're sitting in your cubicle at your shitty job reading Scanner and thinking about the next step in your life (because you sure as hell don't want to end up like us).

Well, enterprising readers, today could be your lucky day. For a measly 99-cents (current bid) you can own your very own online sex toy shop.

That's right, you can rent out dirty DVDs, toys, and lingerie "directed to str8 or gay clients."  And hey, "no experiance is necessary."

So if you're looking for a change, go PayPal .99 to some guy who can't spell and he'll email you the log-in information to your future.

[eBay: Own Your Own Sex Toy Store]