We give Barbie a lot of shit here at Scanner—for her tramp stamp, for being too skinny, for not acting her age and even for making a skeezy porno—but you know what? Fuck that. Barbie brought us a lot of joy back when we were wearing Kissing Coolers and thought that Sesame Street was our "soap opera." Yeah, maybe we'd give her spiky hair cuts and put crazy colors in her spiky platinum 'do with washable markers, but she still loved us and we loved her. And when we were growing up in a government-subsidized townhouse in the meth capitol of the world, you can bet your ass there was nowhere we'd rather have lived than Barbie's Dream House. So forgive us if we're a little too excited about the life-sized Barbie Dream House that opened in Shanghai on Friday.
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