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The Remote Island

"HSM: Get in the Picture": Killing Us Softly

Posted by Lindy Parker

 Alternate Title: Why We Should Never Trust Nick Lachey 

Sometimes when something gets really big, really fast – like say, High School Musical or Newlyweds, we admit to a certain amount of skepticism.  Now, lest Zach Efron should take offense and try to burn our skin with a handful of his tooth whitening gel, let us just say that it’s not that we hate HSM – secretly, we even kind of enjoy it in all its campy, ridiculous glory -- it’s just that the supernova popularity and also the disconcerting suspicion that Efron might be a stepford teen leaves us feeling a little unsettled. 

Regardless, it seems that ABC has found new and more painful ways to make us uncomfortable with High School Musical: Get in the Picture, a reality series chronicling the artistic journey of show choir kids hoping to score a part in a music video that will run during the credits of this fall's theater release. Is it us or is even the prize kind of blah?  After watching, we feel pretty strongly that Get in the Picture is not only the latest attempt to jump on the HSM cash cow bandwagon, but should most certainly be the last...

Our original thought process went like this, "No really, maybe it’ll be awesome to watch high school kids crash and burn American Idol style in contrived auditions with Nick Lachey doing the sideline commentary."

It's isn't.  At best, it's mind-numbingly dull.  Still, all might not be lost.  Who can say what tricky antics the Ephron/Hudgens duo have up their sleeves to revive this competition with guest appearances?  Maybe Vanessa could flash the camera and revisit her nude photo scandal? We're just putting it out there. 


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About Lindy Parker

Lindy Parker has worked as a ghostwriter, editor, dance instructor and a purveyor of dreams, one beer at a time. She now writes for hooksexup.com's TV blog, "The Remote Island." She loves Charles Dickens and Gabriel Garcia Marquez and also, straight-to-video releases with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. It's possible she reads more teen fiction than she should. She hails from Los Angeles, her hometown and soul mate, but she lives in Brooklyn, the fling she'll never forget.

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Lindy Parker has worked as a ghostwriter, editor, dance instructor and a purveyor of dreams, one beer at a time. She loves Charles Dickens and Gabriel Garcia Marquez and also, straight-to-video releases with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. It's possible she reads more teen fiction than she should. She hails from Los Angeles, her hometown and soul mate, but she lives in Brooklyn, the fling she'll never forget.

Olivia Purnell left Ohio for sunny Los Angeles; then found that she couldn’t ignore New York City’s call, and brought herself to Brooklyn where she has worked with GenArt, BlackBook, the School of American Ballet, and finished an M.A. in Creative Writing from N.Y.U. She loves one-liners with sting and hates the stench of the subway in the summer. That said, she can’t get enough of either.

Jake Kalish is a freelance journalist and humorist whose work has appeared in Details, Maxim, Stuff, New York Press, Spin, Blender, Men's Fitness, Poets and Writers, and Playboy, among other publications. He is also the author of Santa vs. Satan: The Official Compendium of Imaginary Fights.

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Ben Kallen is an entertainment, health and humor writer who's been lectured to by Sidney Poitier, argued with by Lea Thompson and smiled at by Jennifer Connelly. He's the coauthor of The No S Diet and author of The Year in Weird, along with hundreds of magazine articles. He lives near the beach in Los Angeles, just like the gang from Three's Company.

Nicole Ankowski has lived in Ohio, Oakland, and on the high plains of South Dakota, but is now proud to call Brooklyn home. She wrote for alternative weekly papers in the first two states, and tried to learn Lakota in the last. (The vowels can be tricky.) She just earned her MFA in Creative Writing and has been published in Beeswax literary journal. She is unable to resist good writing or bad TV.

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