Scanner by Emily Farris Today on Hooksexup's culture blog: We put our politics where our boobs are.
Rough Patch by Nicole Ankowski This contraceptive device sickened thousands of women. I was one of them. /personal essays/
The Remote Island by Bryan Christian Palin camp may get SNL time to respond to Fey sketches. Wahlberg camp still mum on their demands. Plus: Dexter, Brothers and Sisters and Gwen Ifill reacts to Queen Latifah.
Aries (Mar. 21-Apr. 19)
Right now, it's like the universe is channeling the indomitable spirit of Ol' Dirty Bastard, all but singing out, "Baby, I got your money." Because you're such an impulsive little thing, sorting out your finances and planning ahead don't exactly set your heart aflutter. But with Mercury out of retrograde, you're going to feel ready to take on a few grown-up-style challenges, and you'll do it with more moxie than ever before. As you get used to doing things the responsible way, you're going to meet people with a lot more ambition than you're used to — don't ditch your old friends, but don't feel guilty for screwing around above your tax bracket, either.
promotion
Taurus (Apr. 20-May 20)
No matter how long you've been rocking the scene, there comes a point where even happy hour starts to get. . . well, a lot less happy and a lot more sniffling into your beer-y. Lucky for you, last week's new moon is going to leave you ready and willing to create new, healthier habits where your bad ones used to grow. And speaking of growing, now's definitely the time to start exorcising the ghosts of exes past — a new love's looming on the horizon, but if you don't clear out some of your headspace soon, it's gonna feel a little too crowded for your new snuggle buddy's comfort.
Gemini (May 21-Jun. 21)
Usually you've got enough internal dialogue to justify staying in at night — it's like Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are up in your brain, on the regular. But don't underestimate how cathartic it can be to reconnect with old friends more than just once a year at some stilted dinner party. Just taking a break from your own thoughts can help you see things a little more clearly in the long run, and besides, these are the people who know you best. Not only can they offer you some solid advice over strong drinks, but you can also definitely trust them to bring some sexy strangers along. They're your friends, right? You know they've got fabulous taste in people.
Cancer (June 21-July 21)
Funny how life always finds little ways of screwing us over, eh? Just when your path is crystal clear, there's a fork in the road and you have no frickin' idea which birch tree to swing from. Well, you know what they say, when one door closes, another opens — which sounds pretty nice except when you are the one left with the decision of figuring out which one to close. Word to the wise: Robert Frost is the man, and sometimes the road less traveled really does make all the difference.
Leo (July 22-Aug. 22)
Got a passport, Leo? We sure hope so, because it's no secret that last week's new moon lit a special little flame in your soul. You're hungry for new things, and quite possibly finding your true self in the process. We don't mean to get all existential on you — well, actually, we're astrologers, so, yes we do — but don't you think it's about time to shed your firecracker image and figure out what it is you really want out of life? We're not suggesting you lose that flame that makes you special, but everyone knows an out-of-control fire is dangerous; a crackling hearth is sexy.
Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 21)
When the anxiety begins raging, wash it down with an ice-cold beer; then you'll be able to think more, uh, clearly. Well, okay, maybe not — but at least you'll have calmed down some. And a level head (even if it's not entirely clear) means a level playing field for the money matters plaguing your chart this week. It's no coincidence that this moment falls during tax time, and you'll need to stay on top of things. But try not to freak out. Everything will come out clean after Sunday night's spin cycle.
Libra (Sept. 22-Oct. 22)
A single rose is sexy, but a dozen are irresistible, and this week you should get used to being pretty irresistible as the brightest rose in the bunch. With the sun, the moon and Mercury lighting your seventh house of partnerships, this is no time to go it alone when it comes to social events, big decisions or plans for the future. The stars guarantee that every move you make will be better in multiples. Hey, we know where your minx-y mind is wandering right now. . . and we like it.
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)
Even though you're usually one to frantically juggle a million projects like it's going out of style, this week you get to sit back and chuckle to yourself over a mojito, while everyone else rushes about like decapitated chickens. Why all of the calm? Venus and Mercury, which take care of your relationships, are straight chillin' in your sixth house right now, and it's giving you what amounts to a permanent afterglow. Those good vibes of yours are gonna get contagious as you move deeper into April, so gear up to be at the center of a '60s-style free-love-fest later this month.
Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)
This week is going to find you riding April 5th's new moon like a mechanical bull at a honky tonk, and there'll be no lack of strapping wranglers waiting to make your acquaintance. And, right now, who wouldn't want to? Thanks to Aries being all up in your solar chart, your creative energy is on the rise, your social skills unparalleled — finances not so much, but given that admirers are coming your way like flies to a field of cow pies, letting someone else pick up the tab every now and then isn't a blow to your usually independent nature.
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
You've been in desperate need of some release and, thanks to a special alignment of Mercury and Pluto, now you don't really have a choice. If things are slowing down at work and your love life is starting to feel like a distant memory, don't take it personally. You finally have some room to breathe, so use it. It's time to take the world by the ankles and have your way with it — metaphorically, of course. Take the opportunity to do the things you've only fantasized about, not what other people have always expected of you. From the bedroom to the boardroom, now's your time to shine. Work it.
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)
Considering the energy you are exuding this week, are you up to something illegal in the bathroom at work? Is your Red Bull addiction calling for an intervention? It's no secret, you're itching to release that restless spirit. But a loving word of warning: only press eject if you have a parachute under your seat. In other words, you need somewhere for that energy to go, and something for it to focus on — we suggest getting involved in that creative restructuring at work. Actually, we can think of a couple other activities that require acute concentration and unrestrained oomph. . . use your imagination.
Pisces (Feb. 19-Mar. 20)
You've been focusing on yourself lately, and it's been good — but maybe now is the time to pick up the pieces you dropped back in March and find where they belong in the filing cabinet. Let's face it, we know you're no Donald Trump when it comes to earning the almighty buck, but this week you may find yourself glimpsing the good life once the color-coded tabs have been adequately organized. Those raw-bar spreads and overpriced martinis always taste a little better with a side o' success.
