Talking to Strangers: Montreal, QC

Hooksexup asks deeply personal questions to people we just met.

L. Diablo, 32

What do you do for a living?
All sorts of stuff. A bit of corporate, a bit of artsy.

And what do you do for fun?
All sorts of, uh, other fun stuff. I'm a dancer and a professional… partier.

What's the Montreal dating scene like for you?
I find it a bit like a job interview, to be honest. It used to be fun, and maybe it's because I'm getting old, but I find that it takes about ten minutes before I feel like I'm being interviewed for a job, on the average date.

Do you ever do the interviewing yourself?
No, it's tacky. It bothers me. I'd rather things come out when they need to come out, and not feel like someone's got a shopping list of questions that they have to get through by the time I leave the table. Maybe the people I've dated just aren't good enough about hiding their agendas.

Do you date men or women or both?
Both, but I'm on a man swing.

Do you look for something different in men than you do in women?
Yeah, probably. What, exactly, I'm not entirely sure — but if you're someone who doesn't necessarily discriminate between genders, you do naturally gravitate towards different qualities in different genders, depending on what role you're assuming in a relationship.

Has anyone ever offended you in the bedroom?
Oh yes. Absolutely. And I don't offend easily, but what offends me is probably quite surprising to other people. I don't like cheesy. I don't like overly put on. The whole "sweetie, baby, darling" bullshit? We're already in bed. Stop it. You know? I'm not marrying you. You're not my long-lost love. Let's call it what it is.

Have you ever been the one to offend?
Oh, for sure. I have a filthy mouth, and sometimes my level of open dirty talk has been a bit much for the other person.

What is the most unusual place you've had sex?
A trapeze net.

Were you having sex with a circus performer?
Yes.

Did that have any unusual benefits?
Rope burn, conquering your fear of heights. It was fun. And he was bendy.

How did your upbringing influence your views on sexuality?
I don't know. It doesn't make sense, in all honesty. I come from a Catholic-Jewish background, very open, but very proper and prim — my mother, at least. My dad had a dirty mouth, but at the end of the day, I don't really know how I ended up like this. Yay, TV!

Did you have any formative experiences watching TV that we should know about?
I used to watch Solid Gold when I was four, and dance around in my little days-of-the-week underwear in front of the TV — shake my booty with the Solid Gold dancers. My momma's proud.

 

Dev, 31

What do you do for a living?
I do radio.

So, if you were really interested in dating one of these people that you've interviewed, what would make you interested in him? What do you look for in a guy?
A great personality, cute buns... really nice buns... [laughs] I'm a butt guy, yeah.

I can tell. What do you define as a "great personality"?
Somebody who's positive and friendly and smiley and friendly all the time, and intelligent, a great person to converse with... someone who sees the positivity in the universe, kind of like me.

I see. You consider yourself a very positive person?
Very much so.

How does that play out in your dating life?
A lot of people are attracted to that, actually. They seem to see the spark, the energy I have — this is what I'm told by them that they like. Because a lot of people walk around with a dark cloud over their heads, and I don't see any reason for that.

So this is how you impress the boys, you're very positive?
I've also got great eyelashes.

It's true, you do have great eyelashes. They're visible even in this bar.
Absolutely.

Do you have any good hookup stories that have resulted from your flirting?
You're looking for a juicy story, aren't you?

I'm looking for a juicy story.
Okay, here's a juicy story. I once slept with a good buddy's boyfriend. This guy — his boyfriend wasn't treating him very well, and it had been going on for a while. We all saw it wasn't working out, and I wanted to get into this guy's pants. Of course, you have to respect your buddy, and their space, but I could see that this was going down a bad path. So before they could end it, I stepped in. We had the most amazing night of crazy hot sex. It wasn't planned at all. It just happened.

Was there any fallout with the boyfriend afterwards?
After that particular weekend, we kept it pretty discreet, so I have no idea if he knows. They're not together. I know that much.

Was this the first time you'd done something like that?
It was the first time, yes, that I'd actually... no, I tell a lie.

Are you a man-stealer?
It just happens. Okay, it's happened a few times. I don't plan on it happening. It just does.

Have you ever offended anyone in the bedroom?
Yes, I have. There are certain things in foreplay, the teasing and the games, where you figure out what the person is into. And, um... I kind of enjoy peeing on people. And I had a feeling that this guy was into it, because he led me to believe... I was showing him that this was the direction I wanted to go in. But when I started peeing on him, he freaked out. He was screaming "Oh my God, what did you do? That's nasty!" And I said, "I thought you wanted it," and he was like, "Who would want that?" I honestly thought he was into it, but I guess I misread him.

Did you say, "I want to pee on you" at any point?
No, I didn't say that. But to me, it's all about body movement, the dance we do. I thought he was going to pick up on that, but I guess not.

What happened after that?
He got dressed and hid in the bathroom for ten minutes. I guess he was Lysoling himself. Once he got out, he left. Never came back. Never saw him again.

Has that ever happened with anyone else?
No! No. Most people I'm able to read what games to play. To me, sex should be a lot of fun.

 

Gabriel, 27 and Christelle, 25

How long have you been together?
C: Six years.

Same answer?
G: No, actually we've been together for five months now.

How did you two meet?
G: The first time we met was, I think, seven-and-a-half years ago. I was about eighteen or nineteen, and I was working at Blockbuster Video. Back then I was a fat bald kid — but as you can see, I'm very handsome right now — and she was renting movies with her sister. She had leftovers from Pizza Hut in her hands, and I offered a free rental for the remains of her pizza, which she and her sister gladly exchanged for the rental. So that was our first encounter. Our second encounter was like, a year and a half after that, when I had bloomed as a healthy, tall young man, and her sister recognized me, and she said, "Oh look, it's the guy from the Blockbuster!" Back then I was in a metal band called Icewind, and I told her that both sisters — they're twins, so they were like, both hot — so I said to myself, I'm going to try both! I said, "If you're interested, you can go on my web site and leave me a message, which she did [points to Christelle]. We started dating a couple of months after that.

So would you have been equally happy to date either twin?
G: Uh… I know I wanted both at that time.

What was your first date like?
G: I don't remember our first date. I don't think there was a first date.
C: We used to live two blocks away from each other, so he invited me over, and we watched a movie, and then… I left. Something like that.
G: I wanted to have sex with her so much, and she just turned me on and left.
C: The thing is, I knew what kind of guy he was — you know, not interested in any particular girl. Even though I wasn't interested in him specifically, more in sex, I didn't want to be just a girl on his list. I wanted to win, so I played the game, and I ended up falling as well. So it worked out well for both of us.

What attracted you to Gabriel?
C: Well, the first time I met him, he was just the funny guy from the video store. But when I saw him again, he was talking about his music, his life and everything, and I just thought he was special. And my sister didn't care about him, so I ended up winning the guy.
G: She was just interested in me because I was a rock star.

Is that what you do in life?
G: I used to sing in a band, but now I'm an opera singer, so I've kind of evolved-slash-switched worlds now. But singing has always been my passion, so it doesn't matter what I sing, as long as I can do it.

And what do you, Christelle?
C: I'm a makeup artist.

Have either of you ever met someone you've dated through your jobs?
C: I work with women, so, not really. And I work with hairdressers, so most of them are gay. So, no.
G: I wish she would date people she works with.

Are you guys monogamous?
G: Uh… not really.

What does "not really" mean?
C: We like to explore.
G: We're monogamous love-wise — like, she's the only person I love — but we fool around with people sometimes.

Tell me about one of your most memorable dates.
G: Well, it's hard to say, because every day is memorable with Christelle. I wouldn't be able to think about one particular date — our life is exciting and we don't really go, "Okay, let's go on a date."
C: It's true, though. We have a spicy life together. I don't feel like we've been together six years. Sometimes people ask us how long have we been together, and they're like, maybe it's been a few months, and we're like, "No!" So I think we're making it spicy every day.

What's one of the most "spicy" sexual experiences you've had together?
C: We once had sex with two other girlfriends of mine. So he had three girls for himself for the first time. I think he enjoyed it.

Did you?
G: I had a blast.

So you'd do it again?
G: I would do it every day. Well, every day that I'm in shape for it, because it's a lot of work.