Canadian parents decide to raise their child without gender
Gender-neutral nurseries just got taken to a whole new level. This week, word that a a Canadian couple has decided to raise their child without a gender has spread. Baby Storm won’t identify as male or female, even though its(?) brother and sister do. His parents are hoping that a genderless upbringing will be “a tribute to freedom and choice in place of limitation, a stand up to what the world could become.”
Naturally, they’re getting a lot of shit about it. It’s one thing to be okay with whatever your child chooses to become later in life, but pushing such a progressive agenda onto a baby is getting everyone’s unisex panties in a twist.
Will this negatively affect Storm later in life? Is it a weird kind of child abuse? Is Storm gonna get totally razzed in the schoolyard? Maybe, doubtful, and absolutely. But all kids go through some form of teasing and bullying, regardless of whether they identify more with the male or female sex. Is this so much worse than forcing a little girl into child beauty pageants, or a little boy into a pee-wee baseball (the most corrupt of kiddie sports) league?
There’s been a lot of gender-bending news lately. The New York Times recently declared 2010 The Year of the Transsexual, and ambiguously male model Andrej Pejec has been in the news — and on runways — left and right. From the sounds of it, Storm’s older siblings like getting to choose what they wear and how to keep their hair. Could this be a neat new trend?
Comments ( 22 )
Let's see. Utah has the some of, it not the lowest percentages of alcoholism, drug abuse, and heart disease per capita in the nation thanks to their draconian liquor and smoking laws. And now Hooksexup is bashing them for trying to get aggressive against prostitution. Raise your glasses of 7-UP, Hooksexup, and let's drink to being behind the times. P.S.: More than 50% of the Salt Lake metro area, which is the basis for the majority of Utah's laws, is non-Mormon. Sorry to take that punchline away from you.
Man , I live in salt lake city, and the mormons from the suburbs run everything. Sorry to burst your bubble sport, but the stories you hear about Utah are all true. Oh, and Utah has a MASSIVE drug problem, it's just in those little orange pills from your doctor. Cause that's cool with the church. Dealing with psychological issues due to your marriage, your latent homosexuality, or the oppressive blanket of enforced social conformity? Not so much.
As a former Utah resident I can second Will's post. And let me add that Utah also has one of the highest rates of child sexual abuse and rape in the country. Oh, and the highest rate of anal STDs... they're also the biggest consumer of Ice Cream & Jello in the continental US... should I continue?
I'm not behind this whole genderless baby thing. We all have genders. We just do. I think rather than ignore that, parents can just be more accepting of whatever their child's gender preference is. If you give a girl a doll, but she puts it down and grabs a truck, buy her more trucks. If you try and dress your boy child in blue, but he just wants to pop a pink polo shirt, buy him some in a range of other pastels. Gender performance is totally normal, and often times it feels great. Why deny your child that?
*sigh* They're not raising a "genderless" child. They're choosing not to tell other people what their child's sex is and letting the child express their gender in whatever way s/he chooses. I really wish people would get this right.
I think you're right, kindaawk. It's unnecessary to raise a baby genderless. The kid will eventually start making their preferences known. Just respect them when they do. One of my friends is a mom who's been a tomboy all her life. Much to her surprise, her six year old daughter is a total girly girl, and refuses to wear anything but flowery dresses. My brother's son is a bit of a girly boy, and he requested a pink princess dress for Christmas when he was 5. When he opened his present, he looked at it in awe, and said, "I've wanted this all my life."
That is so fucking adorable. Just saying.
Quod licet Iovi non licet bovi.
After awhile, just being able to buy things other people can't and not having to work for anyone else begins to pall somewhat---they seem natural, just your due, and very easy to get used-to and bored-with.
At that point, what better way to feel superior to other people about than to get away with stuff lesser beings can't?. ..just ask Leopold and Loeb, or for that matter God (if _I_ created a zone of eternal torment I'd be accounted a monster, that some believe God did and still think him the model of Goodness is a tribute to just how much above them they think he is).
What? Poor people that can't afford to feed themselves (much less a child) are having abortions? How tragic!
The piece about the Canadian couple absolutely disgusts me. The comments here are spot on. Like it or not, your baby has a specific set of genitals. You're not "progressive" or "modern" by pretending like they have no influence when it comes to a person's sexual development or orientation. They COULD just be open and accept your child for who they end up being. Instead they'd rather race to prove their superiority to every other couple that raises their children the traditional way. What a obviously gross and self-serving method of child rearing.
Genitals do not determine the charged and socially constructed ideas we have about gender. I think it's more self-serving to force constructed identities on children than to raise them gender neutral (or gender inclusive). Also, Ryan, I venture to guess you identify as male. You come from a privileged perspective. It is probably very easy for you to make assumptions about the supposed connections between genitals, sexual development, and sexual orientation. I think all you naysayers should ask yourselves: 'Why do I care if a child is raised gender neutral? Does this make me uncomfortable because it topples my nice and neat gender binary world--the world that provides me with privilege?'
What sort of "Privilege" does me being raised as a male endow me with? Do you think animals have some sort of "social construct" that keeps them mating with the opposite sex (as a whole, anyway). There's no problem with being gender inclusive, there's zero issues with you giving your child Legos and Barbies, and teaching your child to be open and experiment isn't the question. But to pretend that the genitals your born with don't matter, that the hormones flowing through you at puberty don't influence how your body and mind develop, that MOST men and women enjoy fucking each other (even if they aren't a perfect 1 or 7 on the Kinsey scale) isn't just idiotic. It's cruel to a child who will live under these monsters. There's basically two options for this kid to not have a miserable childhood. They can be homeschooled and brainwashed a little more by their self-righteous parents, or they can go through public school while their parents force them to remain androgynous as long as possible.
For you to assume I have some ulterior motive for not wanting people to raise their child without a gender is the most idiotic thing I've ever heard. It's exactly like calling someone a racist when they have a problem with Obama. You sound like a 5 year old grasping for straw arguments, attacking my character while refusing to confront reality. There's no reason that anyone should be forced into a gender role. But to ignore the fact that men and women are different? Beyond dysfunctional. Men and Women ARE different. And before you spew more "male privilege" bullshit, the only intrinsic strength men have is in the top 2% of math and science fields, and perhaps lifting couches. Women absolutely destroy men in nearly every other benchmark of success and natural ability. So I'll pass on you guilting me into admitting I'm wrong just because I have a cock. It's disgusting and childish.
I think JH meant privilege as a cisgendered person, not as a man (but I'm just guessing--that would make more sense to me, at this point).
Anyway, yes. I think it's far more likely that the media attention and inevitable bullying attached to this decision will be far more damaging to the child than any gender identity presented gently by conscientious, thoughtful parents.
Also, Charney has a tiny dick. Why does he keep putting pictures up of it?
Which public bathroom will Storm use once it is old enough to have to make a choice?
There's difference between gender and sex. Male/Female sex is your genitals. Male/Female gender is a societal thing.
@Keep in mind
More people understand the difference between the two concepts than you give them credit for. But no matter how much people can scream and pound their little fists about how they're different, they're NOT independent of one another. It's not always the case, but sex DOES influence gender, usually in a very profound way. Parents who try and pretend this isn't true aren't doing their kid any favors.
Agreed. Gender and Sex are not the same, but they do have a link, and anyone who says differently is a fool. Your sex influences what hormones your body produces in what amounts, and these hormones have a drastic effect on development, behaviour, etc...
If the past 40 years told us anything (with females now being able to do Everything males do, and usually better) is that this "drastic hormonal effect" is actually not that drastic and can be changed/re-socialized within a generation or so. Methinks it's time for males to start exploring some other avenues of self-expression, and let's talk in another 40 years.
Beauty pageants and baseball are not an equivalence. Getting kids active -- all kids -- is a great thing. Sexualizing little girls, and teaching them that their primary value is their appearance, and -- if Toddles in Tiaras has taught me anything -- allowing them to become the most atrociously spoiled children I have ever seen because you rely on their cooperation for income, is disgusting.
Just FYI, calling Dov Charney a Frenchman/French Canadian for having grown up in Montreal is kind of like calling Obama Polynesian because he spent his childhood in Hawaii. Charney's actually an Anglophone Jew, and I wouldn't be surprised if he hardly speaks a word of French.
While I don't especially agree with the idea of the secret gendered child, I see how they got there. Anyone been in a Toys R Us lately? It is completely gender segregated with even seemingly neutral toys like tennis racquets or blocks all tarted up with pink or manned up with blue. My daughter's bike, which is all pink and girlie, actually says "Feelin' Pretty!" on the frame. To her credit, now that she is 9, she is mortified that her bike publicly insists that she is "feelin' pretty!"
jill
https://inbedwithmarriedwomen.blogspot.com
As the parent of girl-boy twins, I'm laughing at the gender discussion. Anyone who thinks gender isn't sex-based is simply misguided.
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