"All of us are hos in one way or another, but very few will ever get the chance to truly pimp." — From Ice T's recently re-released porn video, Ice T's Pimpin' 101.

"Ang said two men herding sheep was far more sexual than two men having sex on screen.” — Jake Gyllenhaal on why he won't be having sex with Heath Ledger in Ang "enemy of the people" Lee's upcoming film Brokeback Mountain.

Proof that Europe is better than we are at political ads: this still from a video encouraging citizens to vote in the European elections. (See, the baby has to decide to breastfeed, just like citizens have to decide to vote!)

Sailors! Come to New York and molest wax celebrities!

Al Gore shows off his jaw muscles.

Alexandra Polier, the "intern" Kerry was accused of having an affair with, fights back in New York magazine with an article entitled "How I Got Smeared."

Advanced Grooming: pubic hair stencils.

Louisiana will not ban low rise jeans.

People keep stealing Cameron Diaz's panties.

A mother wants her transgendered daughter's name changed on her death certificate, from Eduardo to Gwen.

Enrique Iglesias and Anna Kournikova have reportedly eloped.

Say it ain't so: New York bans the sale of used underwear.

Elusive Quality, father of Smarty Jones (winner of the Kentucky Derby and the Preakness Stakes), will mate with more than 200 mares this year, for a per-encounter fee of roughly $50,000.

Fox drops its proposed reality show Seriously Dude, I'm Gay.

"His lips were fixed to mine; the soft velvety tip of his tongue was a tidbit I could not refuse, and I sucked it till I almost choked for want of breath. He spent again under the stimulating emotions with which I inspired him. He lay still for a few moments as we recovered our breath, then, with an upward motion of my buttocks, I challenged him to go on. It was a most erotically voluptuous love engagement. I could not exhaust him; he was continually shooting his love juice into my very insatiable womb, and it was more than an hour before either of us would consent to a cessation of the game."
— From The Pearl: A Journal of Voluptuous Reading. The Underground Magazine of Victorian England (1967)

While there's still no Old Testament glossy — a shame since it means no splashy commentary on the story of Lot’s daughters, i.e., “Don’t sleep with your dad unless you’re totally desperate” — there is now a male version of Revolve, the New Testament-as-fashion-mag. It's called Refuel, and like its sister publication it uses actual Biblical text sandwiched between eye-catching graphics, advice columns, top 10 lists, and articles about Christian bands. — Gwynne Watkins

Axe Deodorant's Pitman.
This blog puts it well: "I believe too much advertising today focuses on unrealistic body images, trying to associate products with sex appeal: 'Use our product, and you will become a chiseled hunk who draws women from miles around.' You, however, have chosen to break that mold, with an ad whose underlying message seems to be: 'Use Axe anti-perspirant, and you will become a hairy torso with no head, arms or genitalia.'"