The Award for Most Lynchian Confession
JANUARY 18, 7:31PM
"A long, long time ago I met a cowboy. And I haven't seen him since."

The Deadliest Catch Appreciation Award
JANUARY 17, 6:44PMM
"I want a dirty, salty fisherman. No one else will do."

The "Hopefully He Doesn't Have A Nut Allergy" Award
JANUARY 21, 7:13AM
"I just want to lick peanut butter off his chest and that's it!"

The Award for Most Likely to Be Dating Mr. Magoo
JANUARY 19, 12:02AM
"I know this is awful, but I really couldn't deal with the fact that you broke my wine glasses, my mirror, and then my blender, even if they were all accidents. That blender was a special edition. I can never get it back. It worked amazingly."

The Elizabeth Taylor Award for Uncommitted Gentiles
JANUARY 18, 11:21PM
"Still miss you, would have converted to judaism."

The Lawnmower Man: A XXX Parody Award
JANUARY 19, 9:40PM
"Hello. My name is Jeffy Calhoun. I am trapped in the internet. Please. Help. I was masturbating to internet porn and got zapped. Again. My name is Jeffy Calhoun. I am from the real world. Thank you. Please don't tell my mom that I was masturbating."

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1 Comments

There is someone out there with the name mentioned in the Lawnmower Man Award. How'd that get past the legal team?

EM commented on 01/25

 

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