"The TXT Book" teaches us how not to blow it by text message

 

We get it: when you meet someone and get their info, the fail-safe method of first communication would seem to be texting. You want to keep the conversation short and flirty without being cutesy about it, and texts provide the best outlet for that.

Unfortunately, though, most people are not great texters. The medium has turned us all into a bunch of abbreviating a-holes, writing in "c u later's" and "ROTFL" (which, according to Wyatt Cenac, actually means "Reaching Out To Fellow Losers.") The new how-to guide "The TXT Book," despite its abbreviated title, has some advice on surmounting this problem:

Here’s an example of a BAD first text message:

“Hey, how is your day going?”

Here’s an example of how to fix that last text… This is an example of a GOOD text message:

• “hey crackerpants! Just what kinda trouble are you getting into today!?”
• “hello my little midget ninja!”
• “what r u up to crazyface?”
• “What has a bottom at the top? -[your name]” (the answer to this one is “your legs, silly!”)

Urlesque tried these out on some friends of theirs and the general reaction was in LOLspeak: "Wut?"

Instead of taking their advice, one could always, you know, call the person. It's old fashioned, I know, but if the phone conversation is super lame, the date probably will be too.

Via.

Image.