Sometimes it sucks not having cable; there are only so many episodes of Men in Trees to watch online (four at at a time, to be exact). Luckily we have some lively folks next door to keep us entertained in our new apartment. And if there's anything we here at Scanner love more than listening to our neighbors get it on, it's a good, non-violent domestic dispute. Last night's happened over an unwashed spoon. Because the walls are thin here in Greenpoint, we thought we'd bring you the highlights.
Him: "I did your dishes."
Her: "They're not my dishes; they're our dishes. But I'll take care of my spoon issues."
Later that night (rather, two or three minutes later)...
Her: "I suck your dick. What more do you want from me?"
Him: "I lick your pussy and you don't even like it."
She left. Then seven minutes later she came back. (Lame! If you're going to walk out all dramatic-like, you need to stay gone for at least half an hour). Then it got quiet. He's probably eating her pussy while she thinks about how much she doesn't like it. This probably means we will not hear them having sex. So, momentarily, we thought about going next door to ask for a spoon. It's only been a few weeks since we moved it so it's entirely possible we haven't unpacked our dishes yet. Except that we have. And that would be mean. But we hope they work it out and keep this up for a while. At least until we get cable.