Yesterday, we opened the floor to debate the Bardem-Lewis European 2008 Oscar-winning Ratherability Act, asking Scanner readers to vote on "who they would rather": Javier Bardem or Daniel Day Lewis. As of Friday morning, the Scanners voted overwhelmingly (11 to 2) that they "would rather" Javier. We have drafted the following Bardem Resolution for your consideration.
The Bardem Resolution
Whereas Scanner has the authority to deem persons Ratherable;
Whereas Scanner has the authority to name persons on its "To-Do List"
Whereas Javier Bardem was so named on February 26, 2008
Now, therefore, be it resolved by the Scanner-readers assembled, that we would rather have Javier Bardem over Daniel Day Lewis. Let it further be resolved that we would rather:
a) have Javier Bardem's Huevos de oro in Between Your Our Legs and up against our Live Flesh
b) have his Jamón, jamón in our Sea Inside
c) that he give us Mouth to Mouth, if so requested
d) and that he provide us with Ecstasy, and Not Love, Just Frenzy until Before After Night Falls.
All those in favor, say Ay (Díos Mío)