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Great Reviews of Bad Movies: Never Back Down (aka Fight Club 2)

Posted by Brian Fairbanks

 

Would someone please explain to us why a movie like "Never Back Down" was even made?

The movie, which opens today to scathing reviews, comes with the following page-turner of a synopsis:

Set against the action-packed world of Mixed Martial Arts, Never Back Down is the story of Jake Tyler, a tough kid who leads with his fists, and, often, with his heart

Awww... sounds like the best tearjerker since "Rudy," or possibly "Requiem For A Dream." Wrong! The critics are laughing, laughing all the way...

Imagine if Fight Club impregnated Step Up. Their bastard child would be Never Back Down.

Never Back Down is a tired, asinine attempt to piggyback on a fight club subculture...

You have had soup deeper than this film, and a referee should have been on hand to call foul on the acting.

Fetishised footage of taut, muscular young men grappling with and pounding on each other. All I could think was, "Oh, go ahead. Back down. We'll all be happier."

In the future, movies this derivative will be made by robots.

And our favorite:

If you combined The Karate Kid with Fight Club, then threw in a dash of The O.C. and You Got Served then beat it with a stick until it was really stupid, you'd have something twice as smart as Never Back Down.

Even the film's (few) positive reviews are full of red flags:

Here's what I hoped for: someone to root for, someone to root against, an inspiring coach, some eye candy and, of course, training montages. I got what I wanted.

Speaking as someone who approached Never Back Down with curiosity and hope rather than a sense of obligation, I implore you to stay away.

Read the full reviews at Rotten Tomatoes.


+ DIGG + DEL.ICIO.US + REDDIT

Comments

Rocky said:

Yay, training montages!!!

March 15, 2008 10:40 AM

About Brian Fairbanks

Brian Fairbanks, the Senior National Political Correspondent for Hooksexup, is a filmmaker living in Brooklyn or New Orleans, depending on the season. He is a heavily-armed advocate of gun control.

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about the blogger

Emily Farris writes about culture and food for numerous publications and websites you've probably never heard of, including her own blog eefers. Her first cookbook will be published in fall 2008. Emily lives in Greenpoint, Brooklyn with her cat, but just one . . . so far.

Brian Fairbanks is a filmmaker living in the wilds of Brooklyn. He previously wrote for the Hartford Courant and Gawker. He won the Williamsburg Spelling Bee once. He loves cats, women with guns, and burning books.

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