Have trouble shopping for the paranoid psychotics in your life? Relax. We've found the perfect gift: The Quantum Sleeper. Here are some of the benefits the Quantum Sleeper offers:
Protection from
Natural disaster
Kidnappers/stalkers
Bullets
Entertainment in the form of
DVD Player
CD Player
Microwave and Refridgerator
Communication with
Cell phone
CB radio
How does it accomplish all this, you ask…
Through the following totally useless and unnecessary accessories:
- 1.25" Polycarbonate Bulletproof Plating/Shielding
- Bio-Chemical Filtered Ventilation
- Rebreather
- Control Panel Mode Selection (i.e., Basic System Ops., Intruder Setting, Energy Status, Lock Down, etc.)
- Cover & Door Actuators w/ Emergency Release
- One way see through head cover (reflective mirror on 2 sides and front)
- Safety Features (Proximity Sensor, O2 Sensor, Smoke Det., Motion Det. Etc,)
- Emergency Communication system (Cellular, Short-wave Radio, CB etc.)
- Audio Amplifier (Amplify sound from out side unit)
- Air/Water Tight Sealing
- External Override Key Pad & Remote Control
- Battery Backup Power
- Toiletry system
So while you're locked in bed with your loved ones waiting out World War III, at least you'll have battery backup power and be able to kill time watching Finding Nemo.