The woman accused of poisoning her Marine husband in order to obtain his $250K insurance policy and buy herself breast implants has been vindicated. [CNN]
Woah! Jay and Bey are gonna get an annulment? At a Barack Obama fundraiser the other night, Jay Z was on stage when the DJ put on his centuries-old duet with his new bride. Jay went crazy, it was reported.
Storming to the mic, he yelled: "Fuck that. Sorry Bey, but fuck that - let's play something else."
Beyonce allegedly, and quite correctly, took offense and stormed off the stage... but not before tripping and falling down a flight of stairs. (Kidding!) [The Mirror]
Without a doubt, the highlight of our year: David Byrne and Brian Eno are going to tour. Music's J.D. Salinger of live performance, Brian Fucking Eno. Can a "Talking Heads" reunion be too far off? [The Daily Swarm]
Scarlett Johnasson denies being a "brazen harlot." Some people don't know how to take a compliment. [Starpulse]
Scanner Exclusive: Amy Winehouse is working with "Back In Black" genius boy/producer Mark Ronson on the theme for "Quantum of Solace," the next Daniel Craig Bond movie, due this October. Since "Quantum of Solace" is even easier to rhyme with than "Octopussy," Winehouse announced her latest track will be called "My Blakey Breaky Out o' Jail With Some O' Diss Crazy Spy Shit."
And workers in Finland figured out what we Americans have known all along-- divorce is a great excuse to not show up for work. They're going to pass a law to institute mandatory "Love Vacations." In other news, Erica Jong is officially irrelevant. [New York Times]
Headlines of the Day:
1) Bloomberg: Next President Will Be "Adult" [via CNN]
2) Pope Meets With Many, Many Victims of Pedophile Priests [We're Gonna Need A Bigger Boat] [via Wonkette]
Photo: Vanity Fair