Nobody wants to celebrate Earth Day by getting down with sex toys that are bad for the earth or bad for your body. A wise woman named Cher Horowitz (from Clueless) once explained that she was still a virgin becuase "You see how picky I am about my shoes and they only go on my feet." So be picky about penises AND your sex toys with the following sex toys which let you celebrate the earth and your body. Many sex toys contain phthalates, a plastic softener, which is so hazardous the European Union banned its use in children's toys. Ironically, since phlatates have been linked to cancer and damaging sperm, we are putting things in our nether regions, that may be bad for our nether regions. Luckily, many sex toys stores are phasing phthalates-containing products. But until the war against phthalates is won, and until phthalates are stamped out around the world, you can use this top ten list of phthalate-free toys.
1. The Laya Spot vibrator is water proof, has 3 buzz strengths, and is made out of Elastomer, which is phthalate-free and hypo-allergenic. Like all good lovers, Laya is eager to reciprocate: she gives buzz and gets great buzz from customers who "Love love love love LOVE!" her, for being "fantastic, reliable and silent" and durable even after "heavy, heavy use." You can buy her from Babeland (the sex toys empire formerly known as Toys in Babeland) for $48.
2. we all know and love the Rabbit Habit vibrator that was immortalized on Sex in the City. So we were heartbroken when we thought we were going to have take the old phlatate-containing rabbit out back and put him down. But we are thrilled to announce the new and improved and phthalate-free version of the Classic Rabbit Habit: The Elastomer Rabbit Habit vibrator. So you can say goodbye to phlatates and hello to the rotating pearls, glitter twirls and fluttering rabbit ears. If you want the rabbit, grab it for $90 at Babeland. And if any readers already have a pet rabbit at home, or have traded in the old one for an elastomer one, tell us if you think the vibrator is worth all the buzz.
3. For an extra $9, you can splurge on the Bunny Love Kit, which includes batteries, Babeland Toy Cleaner, two Crown condoms, and a 4-ounce bottle of BabeLube.
4. The Big O Vibrating Ring is made of elastomer and doesn't contain any phthalates, which could give off unhealthy vibes. It's available for $18 at Good Vibrations.
5. The quiet Berry Delight vibrator has with seven programmable vibration modes and, thanks to its splash-proof exterior, can be taken into the shower (but not the tub.) Get it on sale for $24.50 at Babeland.
6. More of a bather than a showerer? No woes hoes. You can bring the I Rub My Duckie vibrator into the tub with you. And he's pretty adorable. Get him for $25.00 at Babeland (I'm not being sexist. I checked and am pretty sure it's a him.)
7. Treat yourself to a gift with Babeland's $59 Eco-Sexy Kit, which includes the Laya Spot vibrator, a Babeland Massage Candle made of skin-safe soy, Emerita Natural Lube , and Mamba Condoms, produced by a well-regarded Swedish non-profit whose testing process is 15 times more stringent than any other condom company in the world.
8. Boys, you may enjoy the $80 Fleshlight vulva, the vagina-impersonating penis sleeve which goes undercover as a flashlight when closed. It's made of phthalate-free "Reel Feel Super Skin." I can't believe it's not a vagina!
9. More of a mouth man? (If you are, you're a statistical oddity.) Then check out the Fleshlight Mouth.
10. More of a neo-Luddite? Then you'll love this non buzzing good old fashioned Love Ring which is so green it's VEGAN. For real.
Previously(Green) Sex (Toys) In The City, How Green Was My Dildo: Are Your Sex Toys Safe?