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Sloppy Seconds: Eva Longoria's Lingerie Past

Posted by Brian Fairbanks

 

Are you better off now than you were in 1999? We seriously doubt it, although this chart may make you think you're making the same money you were then: nice try, thanks for (not) factoring in cost of living increases, dumbasses.

Charlize Theron at the DNC: No, I won't get married.

Speaking of marriage: Are we upset or could we care less that this movie star got hitched?

Asia Argento has wed in Tuscany, Italy.

The actress married director Michele Civetta on Wednesday in a civil ceremony at the city hall in Arezzo. The 32-year-old daughter of Italian moviemaker Dario Argento was previously engaged to actors Michael Pitt and Vincent Gallo but she never married.

One million new bankruptcies have been filed this week. Just kidding, it was over the last 12 months. Phew!

What does a country gotta indict somebody for in order to get rid of him? Senator Ted Stevens won his primary yesterday.

Today in the Apocalypse: Rat meat is in high demand in Cambodia, thanks to the economy.

Awww, man... the nun beauty pageant has been canceled for the usual, predictable reasons.

You probably heard about Eva Longoria's early forays into lingerie. If that's your kind of thing, you'll definitely want to check out The Superficial's posting of seven-year-old photos, most of which have been virtually unseen, at least on the internet. Here (and above), a taste:

 

Related:

There She Is... The World's Most Beautiful Nun

Starpulse's Celebs Who Should Go Nude: Who's Missing?

Making Stripteases A Cinch: Dita Von Teese Shills For Wonderbra

While You Were Sleeping: The Pregnant Lady Lingerie Controversy

Scanner Highs And Lows: Battle of the Sexies

Eva Mendes: Too Hot For TV, Way Too Hot For Work

Top 5 Sex Scenes Involving Food


+ DIGG + DEL.ICIO.US + REDDIT

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About Brian Fairbanks

Brian Fairbanks, the Senior National Political Correspondent for Hooksexup, is a filmmaker living in Brooklyn or New Orleans, depending on the season. He is a heavily-armed advocate of gun control.

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about the blogger

Emily Farris writes about culture and food for numerous publications and websites you've probably never heard of, including her own blog eefers. Her first cookbook, Casserole Crazy: Hot Stuff for Your Oven was published in 2008. Emily recently escaped New York and now lives in a ridiculously large apartment in Kansas City, MO with her cat, but just one... so far.

Brian Fairbanks is a filmmaker living in the wilds of Brooklyn. He previously wrote for the Hartford Courant and Gawker. He won the Williamsburg Spelling Bee once. He loves cats, women with guns, and burning books.

Colleen Kane has been an editor at BUST and Playgirl magazines and has written for the endangered species of dead-tree magazines like SPIN and Plenty, as well as Radar Online and other websites. She lives in exile in Baton Rouge with her fiance, two dogs, and her former cat. Read her personal blogs at ColleenKane.com.

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