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Back to the Future (or Today in the Apocalypse?): First Documented Case of 'Zzz-mailing'

Posted by Emily Farris

 

We've heard of sleep walking, sleep talking and even sleep fucking, but emailing while asleep? Oh yes.

Is it a fluke or a sign of the imminent technology/drug-induced apocalypse?

A study published in the journal Sleep Medicine reports that a 44-year-old woman turned on her computer and sent emails to her friends asking them to come over with wine and caviar... all while she was asleep.

The woman was taking Zolpidem, which is sold in the U.S. as Ambien. Which studies have found can cause people to eat, walk and have sex while sleeping.

Among the woman's emails:

One read: "Come tomorrow and sort this hell hole out. Dinner and drinks, 4 p.m., Bring wine and caviar only."

Another said simply, "What the ..."

The new variation of sleepwalking has been described as "zzz-mailing."


"We believe writing an e-mail after turning the computer on, connecting to the Internet and remembering the password displayed by our patient is novel," the researchers said. "To our knowledge, this type of complex behavior requiring coordinated movements has not been reported before in sleepwalking," they wrote.

Novel, a sign of the apocalypse. Call it what you will, but imagine if we got on Facebook while asleep and started updating out status with our dreams: "Emily is currently having sex with [redacted]" or "Emily is currently having sex with [redacted] and [redacted]" or "Emily is floating on a chocolate cloud while tiny green men dance circles around my areolas.

[FOXNews: Forget Sleepwalking, Study Reports First Case of Zzz-Mailing]

Related:

Most Likely, We'll Sleep With You if You Grow a Giant Beard

Can't Sleep Because the Voices Keep You Up at Night? Better Get a Quantum Sleeper.

Today in the Apocalypse: Man Injured in Mooning Prank Gone Wrong

It's the End of the World As We Know It

Hooters, Like Cockroaches, Will Survive the Apocalypse... And The Olympics

If Only It Was the Apocalypse: 7-Year-Old Found with Crack at School

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About Emily Farris

Emily Farris writes about culture and food for numerous publications and websites you've probably never heard of, including her own blog eefers. Her first cookbook, "Casserole Crazy: Hot Stuff for Your Oven" was published in 2008. Emily recently escaped New York and now lives in a ridiculously large apartment in Kansas City, MO with her cat, but just one... so far.

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about the blogger

Emily Farris writes about culture and food for numerous publications and websites you've probably never heard of, including her own blog eefers. Her first cookbook, Casserole Crazy: Hot Stuff for Your Oven was published in 2008. Emily recently escaped New York and now lives in a ridiculously large apartment in Kansas City, MO with her cat, but just one... so far.

Brian Fairbanks is a filmmaker living in the wilds of Brooklyn. He previously wrote for the Hartford Courant and Gawker. He won the Williamsburg Spelling Bee once. He loves cats, women with guns, and burning books.

Colleen Kane has been an editor at BUST and Playgirl magazines and has written for the endangered species of dead-tree magazines like SPIN and Plenty, as well as Radar Online and other websites. She lives in exile in Baton Rouge with her fiance, two dogs, and her former cat. Read her personal blogs at ColleenKane.com.

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