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Watching the Watchmen Sex Scene

Posted by Brian Fairbanks

 

We're not surprised to learn Watchmen took in $55.7 million, falling short of expectations. After all, it's a graphic novel, not a famous comic book series people have been reading or hearing about for decades, such as Spiderman or The X-Men. It has no movie stars (unless you count an unrecognizable Billy Crudup), a disorienting and uninspired trailer, and terrible buzz. It probably doesn't help that the same douche who directed a dud like 300 helmed this one-- word of mouth after Friday's opening was abysmal and the movie plummeted in the charts on Saturday and Sunday.

Even the film's sex scene has been disparaged. We get the feeling direct Zack Snyder was trying for laughs here, but this is the same guy that thinks Gerard Butler is a genius thespian and that wooden, clunky dialogue is acceptable in any genre. There's also the problem of how this sequence ends, with the most cliched Freudian moment in cinema...

Forgive the quality of these pics-- they are screenshots from a bootleg of a print of the film. But you'll get the idea, especially when you see the Fleshbot video of the scene.

 

 

On some sort of darkened space ship, two characters (hey, we're trying not to have any spoilers here) strip and immediately begin having amazing sex-- climaxing to the soaring strains of Leonard Cohen's (terrible) original version of "Hallelujah." Oh, and then one of them hits a button and the ship responds by "unloading" its jets. (See below.) One of the oldest sex jokes in the movie playbook. Yawn.

 

You can watch the entire sex scene in all its bootlegged glory, courtesy of Fleshbot.

 

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Comments

briantkts said:

Disagree, entirely. though the comedic climax is a bit clihcee

March 9, 2009 2:08 PM

blondage said:

Jesus, man! Myself and most of my friends who are fans of the Watchmen GN thought that the movie was actually pretty good - quite entertaining. But you are entitled to your (terrible) opinion on that, even if you are speaking for 2 other people who usually have much better taste and the name of this blog isn't "Brian Fairbanks' (terrible) opinion blog". But to trash Leonard Cohen's version of <i>Hallelujah</i>? Get over yourself.

March 9, 2009 2:20 PM

Brian Fairbanks said:

I speak only for myself, although this sex scene is unquestionably terrible-- which was the point here. The movie may be genius, but that's irrelevant.

And Hallelujah is a great song and I've spoken about how much I love Leonard Cohen multiple times on this blog, including just a few days ago when I saw him in concert, but there's no question this version of the song is an overwrought 1980s studio production. It's too bad, since it's one of his best sets of lyrics.

March 9, 2009 2:34 PM

Maxwell Hammer said:

You've obviously not read the book. The exact same sex scene, including the fire spurt, is in the novel. Other than having a soundtrack, which wasn't possible in a book, it's exactly the same scene.

Maybe it's time everyone realized that not every book should be made into a movie. Just because they don't translate well to the screen.

March 9, 2009 2:50 PM

Fad23 said:

Maxwell Hammer writes truly that the flamethrower gag is in the book. However the sex scene is a single panel, not a thirty second thrust-o-rama.

I think this will be a cult film. I'm staying silent on the film, but am happy to quote the majority of folks I spoke to who said "don't see it."

March 9, 2009 3:24 PM

asb76 said:

You know, if you don't like the movie either just say so and/or come up with criticisms that make sense (assuming you're not also bashing the graphic novel).

As for Fad23, the sex scene is one panel in the GN and 30 seconds in the film.  So what's your point?  So what're you saying, that it should it be 1 frame of film to each comic panel? Or do you have some other panel to frame ratio worked out?

March 9, 2009 5:38 PM

JCF said:

I made the decision not to see the Watchmen movie as soon as I heard that Hollywood was making one.  I have too much respect for the graphic novel/series.

March 9, 2009 9:07 PM

Monique said:

I liked the movie fine, it wasn't great but wasn't bad. It WAS too long though, and that sex seen WAS horrible, and I found myself wishing that was one of the scenes they cut to make the movie a more bearable length.

March 10, 2009 11:22 AM

asb76 said:

I think a lot of people aren't getting that the sex scene's supposed to be horrible and cliched.  There is, you know, like, totally some subtext going on.

March 13, 2009 11:38 AM

About Brian Fairbanks

Brian Fairbanks, the Senior National Political Correspondent for Hooksexup, is a filmmaker living in Brooklyn or New Orleans, depending on the season. He is a heavily-armed advocate of gun control.

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