I, Scanner Brian, used to live in a room in one of the old Vanderbilt mansions-- and let me just say, it was no help in getting laid. What was once a family gem had turned into a wrecking ball-ready hellhole, with peeling paint, nails sticking out of the walls and staircases, windows that wouldn't open or close, and walls that would shake with every passing subway car-- the subway stop being right under my window. Girlfriends who would stay the night early in the romance managed to evade staying over there for up to two years after, despite our continued relationships.
Apparently, it worked wonders for Gloria Vanderbilt-- then again, she probably never lived in that building-- as her new X-rated novel is full of healthy sexual adventures. Vanderbilt, the mother of CNN's Anderson Cooper, is 85-years-old...
Vanderbilt, whose past sexual conquests were Frank Sinatra, Sidney Lumet, and Wyatt Cooper (Anderson's Dad, of course), is out with a book entitled Obsession: An Erotic Tale. At 143 pages, it is, as the Post's Andrea Peyser has already mentioned, "easily read with one hand."
I will begin, softly at first so that you can sleep a few more minutes, the long, slow, delicious process of licking your ----, and since I must have your honey milk . . . I will struggle to stay quiet . . . Master, I whisper as you surrender to our ecstasy."
Dare I suggest to be placed fully dressed over our favorite ottoman . . . That done, placed over your knees, skirt lifted, begging you not to restrain yourself in giving my flesh the serious whacking I deserve. An ebony, smooth-backed hairbrush -- most appropriate. The Mason-Pearson are considered the finest, and it would be no trouble, while you are in London, to pick one up of a heft that pleases you at Harrods.
Ludicrous or luscious? You tell us.
The 85-year-old socialite mom of Anderson Cooper says her X- rated novel, "Obsession: An Erotic Tale," came straight out of her subconscious as she slept. "It was all surreal, and then I channeled it onto pages," she told The Post's Georgett Roberts at the Na tional Arts Club gala for Joyce Carol Oates. The steamy read, first revealed this week by Andrea Peyser, is about "sex on many levels -- emotion ally, mentally and physical as well," she said. "Yes, it's graphic -- it's an erotic novel!"
When we asked Vanderbilt if she still has sex, she let out a long, loud laugh, then uttered, "No comment." [NY Post]
Related: