Kids Are Seeing Porn Everywhere

This year, Christmas came with a side of boobs.

BY KATE HAKALA

Vigilant parents usually attempt to keep their small children's eyes off smut at all costs. This Christmas, however, it seems more than a few parents literally handed their precious tots electronic devices pre-loaded with porn.

A 10-year-old boy from Dundee, Australia was gifted with the Huawei Ascend Phone on Christmas morning, only to discover as he was playing with it, that it came loaded with tons of nude shots. "Many of the images were of an unsavory nature. My grandson was very shocked when he saw them," his grandmother told The Mirror. The phone, which had been sold as brand new by dubiously named Carphone Warehouse, turned out to be about as unused as a full condom tossed from a speeding car on the interstate.

This news comes on the heels of an eight-year-old in Virginia opening up his "brand new" Nintendo 3DS cheerfully on Christmas morning, only to discover about a dozen dirty photos had already been taken with the console's built-in camera.The family has originally purchased it from a Walmart, where it, too, has been erroneously sold as new.

Compounding the naughty Christmas gifts, was a lively screening of Disney's Frozen at a movie theater in Tampa, Florida. Kiddies eagerly awaiting the "Let It Go" sing-a-long were instead treated to close-up shots of genitals from the Nymphomaniac trailer, which, somehow, was allowed to play all the way through before the feature. Considering the latest obscenities to leak from Lars von Trier's head were banned from YouTube, the Floridian parents had every right to be outraged. Adults shielded their children's eyes and ran screaming from the theater. There weren't confirmed reports, but we all know that movie projectionist did not keep their job for much longer.

So here's the moral, parents, future parents, and unspecified child-rearers: Vet your gifts before you wrap them. Or at least preemptively download The Facts of Life App to help your kids negotiate the initial shock of their inevitable Christmas porn.

Image via Veer.