Nicole, 19
How old are you?
I'm nineteen.
Are you even allowed to be here? That throws off a lot of my questions... What do you do?
I'm a student.
Do you meet a lot of dates that way?
No, there isn't a large population of straight men at my school.
So where do you end up meeting guys?
It happens as it happens. I just moved here last year. I was meeting people at bars. I didn't really go out seeking it. I'm from Canada.
What's the difference between the dating culture there and here?
No one really takes people out to dinner. It's more like you meet people through your friends and shows, things like that.
Was there any particular reason you chose to come to New York?
Where else are you supposed to go? When you're from a city, and you're trying to move to another city — it's different for some people if they're from a smaller town or, like, a less populated city. I feel like you're moving backwards if you don't move to New York.
Do you have any awesome hookup stories?
I once hooked up with a guy in a Santa suit.
In a Santa suit? What happened?
It was a Christmas party. It was funny. It was a humorous situation. There was laughing.
Do you have any crazy exes?
Yeah. "Ex-whatevers," as I like to call them. Being possessive. Interfering with other things.
What do you think of the dating scene in New York?
I feel like it varies as you go from borough to borough, definitely. There are a lot of people who are really into themselves. As far as that goes, I'm not really interested. I mean, I have yet to meet someone who seems down-to-earth in the city. But I don't get out that much. I tend to stay home a lot.
So what kind of guy are you looking for?
A really tall one who likes music and knows about cool things on the interwebs.
That's kind of everyone in New York. Anything more specific? Do you have any kind of type?
No one who takes themselves too seriously at all. I think it's important to have things in common with each other. I think I could date someone who was doing something completely different from what I was, but there has to be a common interest. Go see the same bands, go to the same museums together. Even if you're not into the same aesthetic, at least you could have a conversation about it and debate about it — not get offended by the other person's point of view. That's just the way to go about it.
Meriwether, 19
What do you do?
I'm an art student.
What's your dating experience been like so far in New York?
I've seen a few guys really casually. Nothing relationship-wise. Some randoms. Then also some people that — we pursued each other but never wanted to be in a relationship because that wasn't how we were feeling.
Do you have any fun hookup stories?
There was a crazy — well, not crazy — but really bizarre male model who came out of my room in the morning wearing nothing but my floral sheet and waltzed around the apartment really dramatically. I was like, "Oh God. What happened? Why are you doing this in my apartment? I have to go to class!"
How did you meet this dude?
At a bar. He was really cool and interesting. I wasn't so much physically attracted to him, but he was interesting enough and pursuing, so I was like, "Why not?" I was really casual. It was fine. He's cool.
Do you have a type that you go for?
Looks-wise, brown hair and scruffy and bearded. And other than that, usually people with a good sense of humor. They have to like cats. That's very important.
Do you have cats?
Yes, I have two.
Do you worry about becoming a cat lady?
I already am a cat lady. It's too late. I'm really far down that path.
Do you have any dealbreakers?
Assholes. And yet somehow I end up with them. In general, I would hope that someone is, like, the kind asshole. Kind to me but an asshole when it's necessary.
So what's your impression of the dating scene in New York?
It's been interesting. There's no one I've wanted a formal relationship with. But I've met some interesting people, some nice guys. I haven't been hit on in a little while, so that's sad. I prefer Los Angeles, where I'm from. I've met more eligible guys there.
So what's the difference between L.A. guys and New York guys?
I don't know exactly. I just find that people here are really consumed, wrapped up in a lot of their own stuff — which is fine, but I find in Los Angeles I meet people that are a lot more relaxed. It's a lot more chilled out in California.
I'm thinking it's a cultural thing. It's so much slower there.
I've had more luck in Los Angeles meeting guys that I would be more interested in formally — a courtship relationship kind of a thing. Whereas here, it's kind of casual and fun and crazy. And weird. Really weird.
Did you have any relationships back in L.A.?
Yeah, I dated someone for a while, a couple of years. He was a psycho, cheater asshole. He fucked everyone. So that ended poorly. But it's okay. I've moved on from that.
Dr. Timmy, 54
What do you do?
I'm in music.
What have your dating experiences been like?
Don't date Russian women!
Why's that?
They're all beautiful and complicated.
Complicated how?
I've been in touch with two Russian girls recently. One of them I took great pains to get to know — it was from the club scene — and I had to make sure that her Russian male friends wouldn't kick my ass. She looked Korean or something. Beautiful girl. [Shows a photo.]
Yeah, she's pretty hot. How old is she?
Maybe twenty-four. I don't know. Drugs were involved, obviously.
Which drugs?
In my case, ecstasy. I don't know what she was doing.
So you're dating her?
No! True story. We were at this party. I had to be sure — these are Russian guys; I don't need some guy kicking my ass. There are a whole number of Russian guys selling drugs at these parties: mushrooms, ecstasy, acid, whatever. We knew each other, but it was hard to talk. It was louder than this goddamn party. How can you have a conversation? You can't. So we go to the rooftop next to the party. We start chatting. I thought that this guy who she was with was her boyfriend. Very nice guy, by the way, but I'm not going to hit on his girlfriend when he's there; that's really bad taste. So we get to chat a little. I'm like, "Well, we should get together." I'm busy; I work a fifty-five-hour work week. Ten days go by. I look her up on Facebook — she's married!
What?
Married! And it's not even the same guy that I thought was her boyfriend! It's some guy I never even saw before.
Maybe it's a green-card marriage?
I thought so, except for one thing. If you look on Facebook, everyone's dressed to the nines in their wedding reception photos. They all look sexy and hot. Everybody looks so happy. Their friends are there. It's this close couple. You can't fake this shit; this is no green-card marriage. So what the fuck? Ten lousy days go by, all I'm trying to do is get her to go out to dinner with me so I don't have to scream over a DJ like tonight, all of a sudden I look up and she's fucking married! And I've never seen the guy in my life. It's like, "Who the fuck is this guy?"
So what's the last relationship experience you had?
That would be called "divorce." Six years in a relationship. My ex was Japanese. We got married in Japan, civil ceremony. Three years later, the marriage was over.
So what happened?
Your guess is as good as mine. Dual income, no kids, fifty grand in the bank, saving up for the co-op or the condo. Life didn't suck. You think you know someone after six years. She went back to Japan twice. The green card, that was my choice. We moved out to Queens; we were living the American dream. It just kind of fell apart.
Maybe she wanted kids.
That was negotiable. We were talking about it. I wasn't anti-kids... I was forty-one when I met her. She was nineteen. When we met, we were both bonked out of our heads at four o'clock in the morning at a psytrance party. I was totally faithful; I didn't sleep with any other women, I didn't date anybody, nothing.
So are you a relationship person or more of a casual-dating person?
I'm not a casual-sex person, no. Which doesn't mean I haven't done a few things in my life, but I can count that on one hand.
Do you still believe in marriage and long-term relationships?
I'm cynical about most things these days. I'm a survivor. But I want to believe. In my heart, I'm a romantic. Which doesn't mean that I'm not a male and I don't want to sleep with everything that walks by me every five minutes.
Did anyone ever surprise you in bed with an odd request?
I'm not easily shocked. I've never had a request that I've said, "I can't go there" — yet. Some girl I said once, "You can put your boots on and walk on my back." After two minutes, I said, "This is the stupidest shit I've ever experienced. This hurts. This is dumb." If you're into S&M, that's fine, but it's not me.
Want to talk to strangers in your town? Email .
Comments ( 58 )
Dr Timmy is creepy, and continuing to read more of his answers is only confirming this.
No doubt. What is he, a pedophile? Get real, dude.
He reminds me of Super Hans from Peep Show. Anyone?
that motherfucker is from MADTV...he is that character....."C'MON!"
marvin tikvah!
SUPER HANS!!!
Poor Meriwether needs to invest in some crest white strips.
Nah, she's good.
ugly
hey
thing
@bloop - give your fucking head a shake. Not everyone needs to be a photoshopped fake with plastic tits. You media whore.
what are you saying theres something wrong with my plastic tits what theyre empowering cmon. this is what liberation from having to do what guys want all the time looks like.
"I was forty-one when I met her. She was nineteen. When we met, we were both bonked out of our heads at four o'clock in the morning at a psytrance party."
Yeah, Dr. Timmy, I can't imagine why that marriage didn't work, either.
Uh huh, I'm scratching my head, too. Was it the drugs, or was it the father-daughter age gap? Sersly.
I am so glad to see Bob Dylan on Hooksexup!
Yo, muthafuckah, I stop by for a spicy fry every once in a while. Praise Jesus!
Bob, I thought you were Rick Springfield for a minute there.
I love visiting NYC for a few days at a time, but this group of people is exactly why I have no desire to live there.
Yes, because (with the exception of the fine Dr.) a bunch of college kids who will move back to L.A. in 4 years are representative of all New Yorkers. You only have no desire to live here because you couldn't hack it, David.
@NY, you could have saved a few keystrokes by simply replying, "I'm too defensive to allow your comment to go unanswered!"
And for the record, I also love regularly visiting my friends in NY, since there's always something fun and interesting to do with them and so many cool people to meet, but I would hate to live in such a dirty, loud, congested, self-absorbed, and provincial place. So I don't. Other people, like some of my friends, find the trade-offs acceptable, and I see them as no more insane (or sane) than myself.
@Hah. Well said, and much more eloquent than me. My sister's lived there for 10 years. I try to make it out there a couple times a year, and I love my visits to NYC. But I also love returning to Chicago, where you can get a single family home for the price of an NYC studio. And NY's right, I probably couldn't hack it there...at least from a financial perspective. Living in cramped quarters is fine when you're single...but add a couple kids to the mix, and there's no way I could afford it. I don't really see that as a character flaw though.
@Hah -- you are literally using "provincial" in its exact opposite sense. You're right about dirty, loud, congested and self-absorbed, though.
@dave - I have a dirty, loud, congested and self-absorbing cough, deep from my lungs. (It could be semen from the last blowjob though.) Should I move to NYC?
@Ah-ha. Why are you inhaling semen into your lungs? I was always taught to spit, swallow, or some combination thereof. I think you might be doing it wrong. That said, Im sure there 's knowledgeable folk in your area that can help you out, although Im sure there in nyc too...so either you got your bases covered.
@faulknersaysrelax There are some definitions of "provincial" that wouldn't make sense in that context, however I used it as Webster's defines the adjective: "limited in outlook, or narrow," which I used to generalize about the attitude of many NYers, meaning that they often restrict their interests to what happens in NY. Maybe that redundantly overlaps with "self-absorbed" to a degree, but as for it being the opposite of reality, I don't believe it is.
touche, salesman. I humbly withdraw my criticism.
'Dr. Timmies' make the world go round!
Dr. Timmy= Howard Stern
I would rather hang out with dr. timmy than any of these other boring-ass twats.
Amen
He's all yours. Hope you're a teenager, 'cause that's all he's interested in...
"I feel like you're moving backwards if you don't move to New York." shut up, nicole.
Why so many youngsters?? Scott's story was cute, but I couldn't help but roll my eyes at the youngsters. It is kind of nice to be reminded of what it's like to be 19 and being ~cRaZy aNd fUn~ but we didn't need three of those stories.
Is that Howard Stern?
Hooksexup - Why do you pick such a small subset of people? Lafayette between Astor and Delancey reaaallly cuts down on a lot of cool and interesting commentary you could be otherwise getting....
That's it. Sunglasses are officially banned.
...how do you respond to some NCO that has been at kings bay Georgia and has never deployed for the past 2 years while you've been in 3 combat deployments in the past 3?? Now that was just an example but my question remains how do most of you as combat vets feel when an NCO that has never had a combat deployment shows up and thinks that because he is an NCO that he knows just as much and has the right to explain the ways of combat to people who have already experienced it??
Difficult situation of course but there should be new NCOs with you who you been to Iraq with who will have a talk with him
I read the comments first before the article and most of the 'interesting' ones are always on the second page..
Dr. Timmy needs to stop being Dr. Creepy.
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Dr. Timmy - I don't know what went wrong..
Couple questions later about wife, I was 41, she was 19 when we met.
Ya think that MIGHT have something to do with it?
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