Hooksexup Amateur Photo Contest: Laundry This month's winners chosen by The Hooksexup Video Blog blogger Oliver Miller. Laundry. We all do it. Just like sex. And therein lies the connection, I guess. Except that in my case, I do laundry about once every two months. And during the bad phases of my life, I have sex about once every two months as well. And therein lies the connection.
I manage to do laundry so rarely by the simple expedient of owning about 100 pairs of socks, 100 boxer shorts, and 50 black T-shirts. I'm like the Imelda Marcos of socks, boxer shorts, and T-shirts. ...Since I do laundry so rarely, for me it's sort of like uncovering buried treasure. (Cool gray long-sleeve dress shirt that I had forgotten about! I missed you!) ...And in a similar way, I found this month's contest entries to be a veritable "treasure trove" of... naked people standing in laundromats, and oh, anyway, enough. Let's get to the winners.
First Place ($500 Prize)
"LaundrySprites_1"
by Anonymous
Cool. She looks like a wood elf. Or a dryad. Or a wood sprite. Luckily for this first place contest winner, I have kind of a thing for wood elves. I played some Dungeons and Dragons as a child. I guess it's not fair that my irrational attraction to imaginary wood elves can impact so important a thing as The Hooksexup Photo Contest, but, well, here we are. Plus, it's nice that she's outside. It's a little thing, but after looking at about fifty "cootie shots" of girls sitting spread-eagled on drying machines, I was ready for a little diversity. And so, congratulations, wood elf! You are the winner!
Second Place
"I'm so happy my bra is done"
by realAARONDUNN
I think we can all share this girl's happiness that her bra is done. Plus, she has a matching bra and panties. That's nice. I respect the effort there. Sometimes girls get lazy and wear unmatching bras and panties, and then you undress them and you're like, Baby, where's the love? Where's the color coordination?
Third Place
"Laundry eye view"
by Camilla Taylor
Cool! Spacey! Björk-esque! Whatever. Yes, she looks vaguely unhappy, but maybe that's just because she feels bad for the person who is crouched inside a laundry machine, taking her photograph.
Honorable Mention 1
"must...put...in...softner...now..."
by laszlo
This one was a little too "Maxim Magazine-y" for me to give it a prize. But I do appreciate that the people in it are very good looking, and that it's a good photo. But look! Non-matching bra and panties. Shocking. Plus... there's... a... spelling mistake... in the... title... of the... photo.
Bad lighting, good concept. Also, the girl in it looks like my friend Kasia. If this is my friend Kasia, then she has clearly fallen on hard times, and is resorting to washing her single T-shirt in a dirty stream. Poor girl. ...Sometimes the problem with me and dirty photos is that I make up too much backstory for them in my mind. Like with the couple in the photo above this one. Like, yeah, they're hot and all, but I'm just imagining a scene where they're doing it in the laundromat and then I walk in, all tired from lugging my sack o' laundry for ten blocks, and I see them, and I'm like, "Oh, sorry!" and then I have to walk out and find a different laundromat, and the whole time I'm irritated, but also feeling guilty and embarrassed, like I'm the one who did something bad, even though they're the assholes who are fucking in the middle of a public place, and, okay, enough. I'm done. ...Feel free to visit me at "The Hooksexup Video Blog." We could use the "hits." Peace, love, shalom.
