The secret is out and the verdict is in, ladies and gents. Charlize Theron is Esquire magazine's Sexiest Woman Alive. Go ahead and read Tom Chiarella's lingering, voyeuristic screenplay-style article about her sexiness and dream that one day you, too, could be an Esquire features writer and have the chance to see the sexiest woman alive rub her belly up close and in person at the Chateau Marmont. If any crew deserves some face time with the Theron, it's you all. You called it from the get go. Smart Scannerites that you are. Well done.