Because there are Hello Kitty assault rifles, Hello Kitty condoms, and you guessed it...
...Hello Kitty vibrators.
But seriously, how can we have the world's most adorable assault weapon without also having the world's most adorable sex toy? And apparently it's been around since we thought Hello Kitty was only good for pencil cases and stickers.
The Hello Kitty vibrator is the stuff of legend. Originally released in 1997 as a "shoulder massager," it had a relatively innocent existence until 1999, when more than a few people started realizing that shoulders weren't the only thing Hello Kitty could massage. From there, it was a short step to incorporating Ms. Kitty in some adult films and that, sadly, was the beginning of the end.
Shocked by Hello Kitty's porn debut, Sanrio terminated the licensing agreement that had made the "shoulder massager" possible and production on the world's most adorable sex toy came to a halt, leaving fans to fight over the last of the vibes and others to wonder if they ever truly existed in the first place. But now, like a battery-operated Phoenix rising out a Japanese toy catalog, the Hello Kitty vibe is back! Or a Hello Kitty vibe is back, at least. The latest of her nine lives is a bit different from the previous one—She's dressed like a horse! In multiple colors! Collect them all!—but we're sure it's just as good at massaging, uh ... "shoulders" as the original. We can't wait to hear her purr.
[Fleshbot: The Hello Kitty Vibrator, Reborn]