OK. We know we've hit it hard on the Olympics coverage what with the naked swimmers, Michael Phelps' penis positions and the toddlers on the Chinese gymnastics team. We know you're over it and you want us to get onto more important topics like what Paris Hilton's vagina eats for dinner and what Daniel Radcliffe does when he's not naked (cause really, we have no idea why this man would ever bother to put on clothes). We hear you! We're not going to be stuck reliving the past like former college quarterbacks who now own used car dealerships. The Olympics are over on Sunday and we will quit it, cold turkey.
This is our last Olympics-themed post. Or at least it's Scanner Nicole's last Olympics-themed post and it's on a topic near and dear to her heart...
Bela Karolyi. We remember gymnastics coach Bela Karolyi from the 1996 Olympics lugging a broken Keri Strugg around on his shoulders. But if he was weird and mustachioed as a coach, he's only gotten stranger as an announcer. His fervent love of gymnastics even managed to freak out the toupeed robotic Bob Costas.
The man loves him some women's gymnastics. Especially some American women's gymnastics. We support this. Bela, we don't care what people say about your monomanical fixation on Chinese gymnasts' ages and your harsh training methods. These are haters, who don't understand your commitment to the whoosh of the uneven bars, the thud of the balance beam and the crash of non-American dreams being shattered.
As a tribute, we'd like to visit an old Karolyi educational endeavor. Here is Gymnastics Fun With Bela Karolyi Part 1. Watch his underweight minions prance around the sweatshop that is Bela's lair with only one thought--OLYMPICS! See the lasers! Feel the passion of the mats! Try desperately to understand what the hell he is saying underneath that thick Hungarian accent.
Bela this one's for you!